Wmill

joined 4 years ago
[–] Wmill@hexbear.net 12 points 11 hours ago

I have a friend I suspect is like this and fwiw I don't hold it against her or anything. It probably takes some emotional intelligence to understand it I'll admit but if we hanged out I'd think similar. I'd be like "Bounti she's cool just anxious, is all good" big-cool

[–] Wmill@hexbear.net 2 points 11 hours ago

Hell yeah, I've not dreamt in a while but the few times I've dreamt of gender it was such a powerful experience. I uh

spoilerdid dream I transitioned but like through magic and it felt like a warm shining light was inside of me. It did feel extremely peaceful radiant even. It's something I think about since it feels like I'm stuck being masc as hell. I do also remember the dream my mom had she told me that I transitioned so she got me a purple dress and cried with how beautiful I looked. This was years before I had that dream.

On the real I don't know if it's in the cards for me or if I'll continue being gnc. I really don't feel there's a time limit on me to figuring it out at least but I'll be lying if I said I haven't been wondering sometimes...

[–] Wmill@hexbear.net 2 points 12 hours ago (2 children)

I'm putting this all down because I should write a novella about it

niko-wonderous I'd def be up to reading it, you got some cool as dreams. I been getting into wizard of earthsea so I'm familiar with LeGuin's works from there

[–] Wmill@hexbear.net 1 points 13 hours ago

Last week did an hour of cardio on thursday, I kind of fell off but if I go to sleep early tonight with lunch ready for tomorrow I should have time to get back to 15 minutes like I used to. Thinking of breaking it up with some dancing in the morning instead of biking since biking is getting boring.

Got my hands on training this week and a job fair I'm going to so whatever I can do to be more confident in my body is a must as I present myself to employers. I am annoyed I will have to get rid of my nail polish but I have some new polish I'm gonna put on afterwards so it's whatever. Having to mute myself to get hired is fr annoying but I need money.

[–] Wmill@hexbear.net 5 points 13 hours ago

this I've yet to fully give up hope just yet on improving my life but I've no clue how'd I'd navigate being a parent and raising a kid when I'd more for them then I have and not even sure if I could give them what I even had.

[–] Wmill@hexbear.net 3 points 13 hours ago

I do that too if I could

[–] Wmill@hexbear.net 11 points 20 hours ago (2 children)

It is kind of a powerful thought the idea I'm ending my genetic line by choosing celibacy ngl. It's like they say breeding ran in my family until it ran into me volcel-vanguard

[–] Wmill@hexbear.net 4 points 21 hours ago

Smh reminds me too much of the british

[–] Wmill@hexbear.net 3 points 21 hours ago (2 children)

Nibbles top tier here don't know what llamas eat tho

[–] Wmill@hexbear.net 3 points 21 hours ago

thinking-about-it Shamma = X + llama I gotta sole for X here

[–] Wmill@hexbear.net 10 points 1 day ago (8 children)

went to the thrift store and made a new friend, anyone have a good name for a llama?

[–] Wmill@hexbear.net 8 points 1 day ago

Fr I finally know the sentiment a lot of white leftists have when around someone who's racist as they let it out. I'm pretty masc looking aside from long hair and painted nails so a lot of these guys will just start ranting about women for instance and I'm like catgirl-huh hate to say it but I can see why a lot of these guys are divorced now.

 

Makes sneaking it in a lot easier, peanut butter good too comrade-doggo

 

It's real simple I'm gonna post PIGPOOPBALLS and then you tag 2 other users with PIGPOOPBALLS then each of them tag 2 other users with PIGPOOPBALLS and so on. The mods and admins won't be able to ignore PIGPOOPBALLS any longer think-about-it

 

Trump cut their funding and now they can no longer see me anymore catgirl-cry back to being lonely again

 

I'm making the list but decided to crowd source it while taking the credit so start listing it off hexbears posting

 

I saw the interconnected webs and the charts, my powerful psychic link with this site has given me insights I shouldn't know. I'll keep the kayfabe up but just know I know saul-stare

 

Maple syrup is gonna be expensive with these tariffs anyway time to stick to jams and jelly for our pancakes/waffles

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submitted 3 years ago* (last edited 3 years ago) by Wmill@hexbear.net to c/anime@hexbear.net
 

:stonks-down: this completely went over my head as a kid :wut: .

 

Uh I'm not a buddhist but thought this vid was cool. Also spoilers ahead

 

Figured I'd talk rn while I feel like the ground pulled apart under me in a way positive and odd. So recently, like 5 minutes ago, found out my sister bought a car to drive herself to work and I'm happy for her but feeling weird.

No secret that I'm neet and live at home. I guess to put it simply I've tied my self-esteem in what I could do for others. One where the transactional nature of capitalism is based on. I get love only so long as I'm useful to those around me and no love otherwise. This of course a ridiculous standard I would never hold to other people but one I can't shake off myself so easily.

Was the driving tough yeah but I was getting used to it. Same with the need of postponing drink or other activities so as to be useful in driving my sister where she was needed.

Now though, I feel as though I lost something and I feel a sense of sadness and dread. Brain is meh but I feel it in my stomach.

I know there is still more to do around the house but the question comes do I do it because it needs to be done or to preserve the other esteem that this patriarchal system as instilled in me. I've heard the term other esteem once to mean a self esteem rooted in other people or external and thought it would fit here.

Normally I'd try not to think about but I know if left unaired this will fester. I also have the duty of being some kind of role model here now that I'm a mod. To this end I shall be more open with my emotions and encourage other masc comrades to do the same here.

I would like to here what my masc comrades thoughts on being needed and doing stuff. Tell me your thoughts, feelings, and anything you always wanted to say but were too afraid to. I'm new at this but will try my best to respond with empathy and understanding because we all need it :hug

 

So I read this on the recommendation of two comrades here and I loved it. Hard read at times since crying and having to confront a lot about myself and my up bringing to realize I got a lot of work I need to do to be full emotion feeling. I'd encourage everyone to read it or at least stop by here to ask any questions y'all might have on it. I'll do my best to answer anything but would like to get everyone's thoughts on it.

 

So I thought we could complie a list of super cheap foods we all make. Times be tough but maybe we could all post some things that requires few ingredients. I'll put some in the comments to get started.

 

So a while back got recommended Pedagogy of the oppressed but between this, two other books, and a podcast haven't finished anything. Family matters also don't help. Memes are fun though but I admit not a substitute. This not my meme by the way but just recognize it.

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