skymtf

So sadly I failed my drivers test, so going to a thrift store a few cities away isn't happening, but I'm still going on a trip and I want some decent girl clothes to wear while I'm with friends who affirm me.

Im pretty confident in driving abilities for taking the test this week with nearly two months of driving with someone else. My only real issue with taking my drivers test is that its my understanding sometimes DMVs have a secret everyone fails once policy, or some instructors do. I'm mainly wondering on average in the US low long did people have to wait.

I know ive made post like this before, but I really do feel pretty defeated, I just dont look anything like my selfies to others, I look pretty awful to be honest, I weight 200 lbs and its been a struggle to loose weight, I know the solution is to see a dietation, and only stock my home with healthy foods and go to the gym maybe but the truth is I can't really afford that and I dont feel like I can really cook until I move since my mom is kinda defensive over the kitchen. Ive struggled with binge for a while and I just look at photos other people take me and want go vomit, I look so awful. I look like zero months hrt dispite a bit over two years of hrt. My selfies only look okay cause of angles. People have also tried to convince my male fat will redistribute but I know that isn't true and that it will stay until I get rid of it. Also I apologize for the grammer in this post, I'm writing this as I'm about to mentally explode.

Ive watched videos and I always end up getting really overwealmed, its also cost. Like the thrift stores in my area arnt very decent, and you can't try on anything anymore but I'm still on a budget. I kinda want to avoid shein, cause sizing was strange, and child labor. How stuff fits is also kinda hard since I don't really have hips and given I started puberty at like 12 I doubt they will ever exist on my body. I have some basic fem T shirts and Jeans I need to wear a belt which ive gotten gendered correctly a few times while wearing.

So for some context, I'm a pretty unattractive trans fem, I have issues with autism and adhd. I've recently just kinda came to realization I think I'm gonna be a loner for the rest of my existence, I don't blame anyone cause I'm autistic I don't pick up on jokes or social stuff. I get wrong ideas. I sleep 24/7 to try to sleep it off

I am honestly kinda curious how exactly you manage your servers and keep them up to date, I feel like there is a linux patch every week or so, which would usually require a reboot. Do you all deploy live patching, how you become aware of critical stuff in your otherwise busy lives, RSS?

I don't ever really see myself having a decent job. FFS feels like Its off the table.

I'm on mobile and I was wondering if anyone had a link for the community matrix chat? Is there one. I can't get the calckey instance to load right now to find it.

I have noticed quite a bit of delays on the frontend, not mad as I understand a ton migration stuff has been happening just wanted to check if I was alone in my expereince.

!I got better for a little while, but I realized I still look awful, dieiting seems kinda out of reach and also I feel like hrt can't fix me. I'm broke and getting off hrt is likely a good idea, tonight I'm gonna stop taking hrt. I'm gonna repost this on some truscum sunreddit cause while I disagree with them on nearly everything I feel like I do look creepy and I don't need love I deserve to be put in my place

https://imgur.com/a/S3LcFxO

as you can clearly see the first two are most accurate the others are angles and tricks

I'm a liar

!<

For some context I really want to loose weight and get rid of some pre hrt male fat I still have, I currently only eat one meal a day but from my thinking since they all seem to have some level of surgar I'm actually gaining weight even though I've only eating once that day. I'm not really sure but I know exercise will help and gym membership seems semi cheap.

I was wondering what exactly should I do there to help with that.