this post was submitted on 09 Jul 2025
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Can you believe it folks, I'm outside in my jorts, old man shorts, sunning myself, with no sunscreen mind you, that stuff causes cancer, and Iran, of all people, tries to drone strike me in my naval. Very rude, I'll have you know, I have actually the strongest naval of any president, that, quite frankly, anyone has ever seen. trump-anguish

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[–] [email protected] 54 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Yo, my boy Trump wishes a mother fucker would. He ain't scared of you. He's practically begging for you to do it. I heard him telling his friends you don't have the stones!

side-eye-1side-eye-2

[–] [email protected] 28 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

What're you going to do? Stab me? - Man who then gets stabbed.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Do it and I'll convert to Islam.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago

downloading the phonetic pronounciation of the shahada just in case

[–] [email protected] 33 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I heard Trump said Iranian pistachios are shit. These aren't my words, just words I heard. Someone pass along the message. Thank you.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 days ago

I heard he said Tahdig was an Israeli dish

[–] [email protected] 35 points 3 days ago

I feel like this deserves a change.org petition

[–] [email protected] 32 points 3 days ago

no more half measures walter

[–] [email protected] 29 points 3 days ago (1 children)

The article cites "Iran International"... I'm tired.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Mossad & MI6 (of course also CIA).

It used to be funded by the Saudis until they normalized with Iran as one of the conditions was for the Saud cartel to stop financing terrorists inside of Iran.

Iranian hackers just took it offline though alhamdulillah

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago

Normal people:

Mossad, MI6, and the CIA: So, picture Trump sunbathing in the nude at Mar-a-lago, with just a hint of pink sunburn starting to form on his shriveled old man balls...

[–] [email protected] 33 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 25 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

Trump will be in the air within 10 minutes of the US confirming ballistic missiles heading towards US mainland. That shit needs to be shot from a submarine literally on the coast or else it's not gonna be fast enough.

I genuinely think a person with a grenade would be more effective. Or a wire guided drone.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 days ago (3 children)

illegal-to-say we saw how close the Crimer dipshit got and he was just some clueless teen with a rifle anyone in america could get their hands on.

The yamagami approach of just walking up worked vs Abe (and almost worked vs Regan) but I dunno if someone could get that close to the president nowadays.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 days ago

It's a good thing we have a stable genius for president and not a greedy pig that you can literally just pay for access. Otherwise you might have the fucking my pillow guy being regularly spotted in the rose garden

A cool tom Clancy plot would be like a foreign actor gifting the president a jumbo jet and wrapping the wiring harness in c4 or something lol can you imagine shit would never happen in real life but Hollywood is crazy the shit they come up with

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

If average people had access to fly by wire bomb drones that can't be jammed out of the sky he'd be dead already. It's an incredibly easy option that is basically only in the hands of military right now.

Honestly I think the fly by wire isn't even necessary and the only component preventing it is accessibility of a trigger mechanism for an explosive. Most people that would be willing to carry this out simply do not have the knowledge or focus to learn how to make that part for themselves.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago

There is one with the power of impenetrable disguise deep-infiltration

CW: jumpscarebrace-cowboy

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Trump will be in the air within 10 minutes of the US confirming ballistic missiles heading towards US mainland

is he flight capable?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

When he gets excited, he floats around the room. He's on that Baron Harkonnen mindset.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago

A big enough trebuchet is a pathway to abilities some consider to be... Unnatural

[–] [email protected] 25 points 3 days ago

Don't talk, just do it if you're gonna!

[–] [email protected] 26 points 3 days ago

Oh nooooo, that would be terrible.... please don't /s

[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 days ago

sunbathing Trump at Mar-a-Lago

C'mon Iran! At least give us good content. You let us down by not sneaking in a camera and taking some photos of BOSS HOGG.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 days ago

LOL DO IT NO BALLS U WON'T

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Would the overreaction to this be worse than the trump effects we have now?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I think if Steven Miller or JD Vance were able to seize power, they would be much more competent fascists. Hard to game it out though, given their extreme lack of charisma

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I think the critical lack of motion destroys them. They are sauceless. Honestly I'd be surprised if we didn't see the rise of one of his kids in response.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

By "lack of motion" do you mean that vibe they give off of waiting around for a strong man to tell them what to do? If so, I do agree. It is a fatal weakness in their line of work.

Inb4 Ivanka Trump and Chelsea Clinton "unity ticket"

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 days ago (1 children)

That's Vance's half of it, but the waiting around is part of the lack of charisma.

They are boot lickers not boot lickees.

People just don't wanna follow these guys. Miller seems like the type to take charge if he thinks he could, but the vibe I get from him is Rob Schneider in Down Periscope.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Not a film reference! My secret weakness

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

"leadership through screaming" sums it up pretty well I think. That only works if you're super charismatic otherwise, and he's got no juice.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I can totally see him trying to be that type of leader but his nasaly/weasely presence would ruin the effect I think

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago

Miller is not a dude who inspires confidence or fear. Most of the republicans are one or the other, Miller is both.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 days ago

fuckin do it then

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Are we finally getting those Iranian sleeper cells that the media was talking about a week or two ago?

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago

The MAGA response would be something to see. A bunch of unhinged people full of rage just raging out.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 days ago

for real? you mean it?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 days ago

don't threaten me with a good time

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 days ago