I've been getting back in contact with some good friends I haven't talked to since ~2016-2017. Turns out the 2 people I was most interested in reconnecting with out of the 8 or so people I used to hang around with in college are getting married... to each other (They had never dated or shown interest in each other while I was still part of that whole group, so it was a bit of a surprise!). We had a great day on Sunday, if even for just a couple hours. They invited me to their wedding, and the bachelor party :) I'm excited to catch up with everyone else there, too.
this post was submitted on 17 Jun 2025
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That's great mate! They obviously valued you to meet you at all, and they must still like you to invite you to the wedding. Really happy for you
Thanks! I wasn't planning on being super vulnerable, but it all just flowed out so here's a wall of text: Yeah, I very much value these friends, we were so very very close for so many years, we went to high-school together, knew each other since 2006. In ~2016, I got really really drunk (which I didn't/don't normally do) and said something stupid to the group that was way out of line. I got so incredibly embarrassed and had so much shame that I pretty much just ghosted them. I couldn't get rid of that shame and had no idea how to process it so I just never talked to any of them again and turned to a romantic partner for all my needs. Super unhealthy. I tried reaching out again in 2021, but I was still debilitated by shame and resent for both what I originally said, and the fact that just totally ghosting people you've been close with for a decade for one stupid off comment is absurd in its own right... that didn't work out. After making a lot of personal progress and finally some much needed therapy, I've gotten over the shame. Well, it's still there, but I'm more at peace that it's part of the past that I can't change, and it deserves to be forgotten, it wasn't really all that bad to begin with. I still resent myself quite a bit for the whole debacle, but reconnecting with them, and getting positive results and finally making progress and doing more than just awkwardly share a few texts is what I need to work through that resentment. Sometimes when I'm having a bad day, I still get the impulse that it would just be so much easier to just ghost everyone again and not have to deal with these feelings, which is WILD to me considering how much I really want to talk to them again. Like how can one stupid comment I made while drunk 10 years ago affect me so much. Brains are kinda stupid.
We've met up a couple times now, gotten breakfast, just shot the shit for an hour or two, caught up on the crazy amount of things that have happened to us all.
When I first reached out to these 2 a month or two ago, literally 2 days after I sent the first text, I saw one's brother and another friend from that group at a concert, and we talked and moshed and shared a joint, like what a crazy coincidence. We're trying to coordinate more concerts.
People sometimes forget how powerful shame is, it's an awful emotion and really painful. It's natural to avoid someone who knows something negative about us. You've done amazing getting through that, well done
received an email from the local library that the books i requested are available for pickup :D
Poker face season 2 has had some great lines, great smiles and laughs from the episodes. Great show
Good tip thanks 😊
Today when I was coming home from the store, a man on the tiniest motorcycle I’d ever seen a grown man ride zipped down along the street. His knees were sticking out so that he could squat down on it. I didn’t straight up laugh because I didn’t want to be mean, but it definitely made me laugh inside.
I don’t think it was a stolen kid’s motor bike or anything like that, it looked strange and squat, almost like he was driving a sidecar. But I didn’t get a great look at it.
My brother has a Honda Navi, which is just kinda like a scooter shaped like a tiny motorcycle. I've ridden it before and it is hilariously fun (You can do wheelies on it, which I was not expecting), I've been tempted to pick one up myself for zipping around town when I'm just a little too lazy to take the full-size bike out. He looks so funny riding it. He has some kind of vintage hard suitcase thing bolted to the back and he does most of his shopping with it lol.
I was texting my friend about us seeing 28 years later, she was ribbing me about how excited I am. It was really funny. I was also laughing loads watching silicon valley last night I'm so glad I found the show!
Thank you for the post !
Np Blaze. I couldn't work out the scheduling in advance thing, does it definitely work?
Hm, at least from jour lazysoci.al it should, but if you're okay with creating it manually once a week, it's okay as well!
Cool thanks 😊
I saw a cute picture of a duck today. Made me happy
Ducks are always good!