They are posting harder than us. Hexbear could never come up with bits this good (we are libs)
this post was submitted on 07 Jun 2024
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Right how is nobody seeing this is a bit lmao
He's literally a comedian, but this is a good bit because it's indistinguishable from the actual ”motivational” garbage you'd see on that site.
Oh I hope this is true because these are exactly the kind of people who lurk in my nightmares.
Holy shit, are you telling me we all just got bamboozled here? If this really is a bit, it certainly fooled me.
many such cases!
We don't have the levels of Evil in our souls to write this and not instantly erupt into flame
Strong and healthy business connections like Hitler had with IBM, Krupps and Henry Ford could save millions of lives
This is what I'm saying
Rich Hitler would've just been waaaay more efficient at killing people
Stopping the Holocaust one Vanguard ETF at a time.
LinkedIn has become "Facebook that you need to post on to get a job" and I resent its existence.
Anyone who decided that everyone should have a “personal brand” has a special place in the gulag.
What dumbass decided you need to become an industry celebrity before you officially hold even an internship in said industry?
Anyone who decided that everyone should have a “personal brand” has a special place in the gulag.
It's the marketers, they're the root cause of all this
power of people in a business context, which is always morally good
there is no amount of reeducation that would fix people like this
“I would be cronies with Hitler”.
Is someone putting a gun to Linkedin members heads and forcing them to write nothingburgers of posts?
This isn't shitposting? It's gotta be. Just because LinkedIn is a "professional" site doesn't mean that people won't do bits on it.
In fact there's something more hilarious about LinkedIn shitposting vs when it's done on "appropriate" sites because it's the same energy as stuff unironically posted to it every minute of the day, but just taken a tiny bit too far. And even then not that much more. But nevertheless enough to show how utterly unhinged business culture is.
First index fund was in 1972, but I guess this scenario already has time travel
They had mutual funds and they were doing the dumbest shit with leveraging them in the late 20s and well you probably know what happened next.
Mr. Hitler, sir, have you tried mindfulness?
Time traveling to WW1, shooting his stupid-mustache having ass in the head and then giving AK-47’s to the Spartacists
They want to connect with you... emotionally
I swear, these idiots think they’re geniuses for telling the internet “cronyism good”, because cronyism is just what “business connections” is.
like this has to be a bit right? 
hold up, its actually genius. when Hitler loses all his stock options in The Big Sad he will just ventilate his brain in 1929 instead of 1945.
That or he somehow becomes even more antisemitic and tries to exact his revenge (in a business context of course)
Mfw Hitler blame the jews for the crash and commits an even bigger genocide.
Throwing baby Hitler into a wood chipper just seems so much easier tho
Baby Hitler: gut ga bbbbbbb
Baby Hitler's Dad: Was machst du mit meinem Baby?
I'm often asked "would you go back in time and kill baby Hitler?"
howwww often exactly is Ken Cheng asked this? I would like it quantified please. Like how many people have approached him and asked him this question in the past year.
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100% this is written by AI
This is obviously a bit guys.
No, he actually is often asked this
Exiting my time machine I grab the baby while its mother's back is turned and abscond to a distant year where I can read this textbook out loud to a baby.
successful stock option holder hitler joins nazi party under himmler, what now, binch?
Isn't this an actual matt yglasias line? "if CEOs couldn't have unchecked power they would just become warlords therefore capitalism good" is something that has flopped out of his brain as some point I'm pretty sure
Wall
"I want to connect with you, emotionally :)" out-of-touch-ass mf
Index funds are emotional for him, spreadsheets are his love language.
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I mean....I don't want to be the guy to say European culture was the problem, but there were German concentration camps when Adolf was just 16 years old and British concentration camps before even that. Additionally Hitler wasn't responsible for eugenics, that was just Western European science originating in....the 1800's I believe? I mean scientists were literally publishing books on how the poor and the disabled were destroying society, and eugenics continued for a short while after the end of WW2 (until very recently as well if you include Israel and what's being done to people in detention camps at the border in America). Killing baby Hitler doesn't stop the psychopathy. Apparently the Nazis were huge fans of Ukraine because they were impressed with how dedicated the Ukrainians were to killing (Poles? Jewish people?). Balfour for example aided in the creation of Israel not out of a love for Jewish people, but because he was a rabid antisemite who wanted to remove Jewish people from Europe. Churchill actually admired Hitler and sent a letter telling him he actually agrees with him.
Basically Stalin shouldn't have stopped at Berlin.
Hitler had some good ideas he just didn't embrace vertical integration and didn't understand KPIs. If I had a time machine I would go back and give Hitler Scrum.
A fascist made a business connection and saved a life today. Have you?
If you think like this we can safely conclude you aren't linked in with reality.
The internet is so cool because people can conjure up all sorts of wacky stories!
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