Fired from my job a few months ago, did manage to get a temp gig but that runs out in Nov and job prospects are non-existent. So I'll lose my home and likely have to live with my parents as a 30 year old. Not a single friend I can hangout with IRL. No one I can talk to. No SO, dating app fatigue. No real motivation to even try anymore. And within the last few days I've come to question my sexuality. I've come to accept I'm not really as attracted to cis women like I used to be and have an interest in trans girls but fear that just makes me a chaser so idk wtf to do about that. Honestly haven't been this low since I got involuntarily hospitalized after getting addicted to benzos in my early 20s.
It's not as bad as it could be but looking at the future I can only see it getting worse and that's what gets me.
My parents are great but loving with them is a major ego & self confidence hit. Plus no one wants to date a nearly 31 year old living with his parents. Makes intimacy very difficult. & "It" is referring to my situation specifically but the state of the world certainly does not help.
I really appreciate the kind words though. Truly. Thank you so much