naom3

So I’m starting to wonder if I’m getting delusional about whether I’m still boymoding. The other day I was talking with an instructor who I had met before but hadn’t really talked with and out of the blue he was like “oh before I forget, pronouns. They/them right?” And I straight up replied with “sure” He also said that he was reminded because he was talking to [other instructor] earlier and apparently that instructor mentioned me and then corrected his pronoun usage and then he wrapped up this story with “he is getting better at this”.

I have never told anyone irl to use anything other than he/him, they just assumed I didn’t use them. Apparently it’s becoming common knowledge or something that I’m not cis, which is, uh, like I don’t even present any differently (aside from that week I wore nail polish) I literally wear the same clothes I always have. The first week of class an instructor was doing attendance and called my (very masc) first name and I raised my hand and he just looked at me like

Yes

Because you’re so good they won’t get sick again, right?

It’s programmer socks all the way down

I feel like I’ve won the lottery with my current schoolwork becoming one of my hyperfixations because I don’t know how I’d be able to sustain this level of work otherwise. Caught between trying to ride this wave for all it’s worth and pacing myself so I don’t get burnt out

heh, another challenger?

I stop taking the anxiety med, I have more anxiety when I'm going outside

This is so real. Every now and then I try and go off cipralex so I can feel full emotions again and I quickly get reminded of why I’m on it in the first place

Mood

Stay tuned!