dustbunnies

not a perfect analysis, since Mickey is only human, but some worthwhile thoughts from a queer ND leftist therapist

edit: the stuff about how this behavior can echo that of the evangelical church made me realize how much of my experience the past few months had awakened religious trauma for me and was a huge catalyst for lessening my activity on this site.

hello ❤️

my son is a senior in high school and will be attending prom with his boyfriend in about 3 months. he hasn't decided what exactly he's going to wear, but just in case it's a tux or a suit, I'm trying to get my ducks in a row because idk where to even begin. 🤦

searching "rent a tux near me" gets me all kinds of cis-man focused stuff, adding "trans man" onto the end didn't get better results. I'm sure there are all kinds of considerations to keep in mind, but idk the first thing about getting a tux for anyone at all, let alone a person with a different body shape than Average Dude.

I might be over-complicating this and worrying too much (haha me? 😅🙃 never!) please let me know if that's the case. it would be a huge relief!

I know we need to start with measurements; I'm fairly confident about taking them, since I've previously successfully measured him, my husband, and myself.

after that, I'm totally lost. his body shape is becoming more blocky and less curvy, but he's still got a little bit of hip that seems like it might be difficult to fit in suit pants. he has binders that he finds comfortable, so I think shirts and jackets might not be too difficult to fit, but heat might be an issue? he gets grumpy when he's too hot, just like his mom 🥰

we live in rural Ohio, so I don't feel comfortable taking him to a random rental place; most of the time, people are nice to us, but I don't want to risk it for prom. we can drive about 2 hours to get to Columbus, OH, which has a pretty large queer community and probably has a safer place to go for fitting than anywhere closer.

all of your thoughts, directions, suggestions, advice, encouragement, reprimands, and jokes are welcome thank you.

you can tell who I am from the back 'cause it's heavy

I was part of the group that got banned yesterday, and I need to apologize to you all.

I have seen people mention previously that sometimes mods take upvotes for agreement, but I haven't trained myself to stop the reddit habit of voting on "food for thought" things, useful-addition-to-the-conversation-but-not-my-pov posts, and placemarkers in active threads, and there aren't downvotes here to easily mark the shitty stuff I want to come back to and learn from. I should always be opening things in new tabs instead.

I foolishly upvoted this comment as a "food for thought" comment and planned to come back to the thread yesterday evening to find it and read the responses and learn from them. instead my upvote counted as agreement and got me banned, which I know is my fault for not adapting to site culture and not foreseeing how that would be interpreted.

I totally understand, feel like the worst kind of fool, and spent my ban time thinking about what a piece of shit I am. far worse than that is the thought that any of you might think I agree with that comment, so I am posting here to apologize profusely and publicly for my upvote. I'm really, truly, terribly sorry, and idk what to do to about it except fuck off and try not to be such a fuckhead in the future.

you didn't know that was why I upvoted it, it just looked to you like a bunch of your alleged comrades liked that post, and I was one of them. I hope you can forgive me, but I understand if it made you think differently about me. I get it, and I'm just really, really sorry.

as soon as I figured out that I was banned and why, I sent a version of this via DM from my old account to an em_poc user who is very near and dear to my heart, but I don't feel right only apologizing to one person when so many of you could have been hurt by my upvote, hence this post. I'm sorry that my apology to the rest of you wasn't that immediate, but I was worried that posting it from my old account would be seen as ban evasion and make my contrition seem insincere.

I appreciate very much the kindness and compassion so many of you have shown me, and it is devastating to know that I have repaid it in this way.

I'm very, very, very sorry.

please heap your scorn and excoriation here.

let's give each other something to cry about that heals instead of hurts ❤️ what silly thing makes happy tears spring up in your eyes?

awards ceremonies always get me, no matter how mundane – I was the weird 4H mom applauding and wiping away tears about every kid, not just her own 😂🙃

love seeing someone open a gift they're genuinely super excited about

commercials often get me, too

like, literally, just your voice, just the way you normally say things

this tickles the fuck outta me, what is this from?!

commie tinkerer/mad genius mods a bicycle with a ring & pinion gear from a trailer jack. why? who knows, @[email protected] assures me that this kind of gear is not meant for speed, so it's not a very practical mod, but it is very interesting.

watch the wall behind him with he gets into the workshop in the first minute and you'll see his hammer & sickle he didn't play the anthem snippet when he showed it this time, but he usually does

someday, in a few years, it'll be done

maybe

probably

maybe

anyway, the point is that I think of this project everyday and rarely have time for it, but it stays close to my heart, and every now and then I make a little progress

may we all light the smokes of our choice off the zionists' flag

I've gotta get outta here

Sink down

Into the dark

jk, of course. honestly feels a little shitty to make this joke, but I know she's not on Hexbear and it helps me feel better about this situation, so 🤷😂

jfc, it is genuinely shocking to understand this as her impression of me – just not at all the social feedback that I am used to

cannot tell you how many times I have been told I come off bitchy and c*nty and self-righteous – that sentence was genuinely astounding and I am still reeling, hence the post

officially AuDHD, with suggestion to seek OCD help as well

if you've been assessed, how did you feel about your results? did it take you a year to fully assimilate them? 😂 feeling like it's gonna take me at least that long to really take all of this in

you don't have to describe them in detail with dates, not trying to get you to doxx yourself

but it's kind of A Thing with neurodivergent folks to have tried a lot of different jobs, and I'm curious about everybody's count

I think I'm up to 21 that I've filed taxes for, which doesn't seem that extreme for 42, except when you consider that I've been unemployed most of my son's 17 years of life because I couldn't handle parenting and that level of outside obligations, so most of those happened before I was 25 – so 20ish jobs between 15-25

how bout you, how many things have you tried?