"I was just being stupid on purpose! To troll you, and also help you!"

Okay bud.

It's important to point out that no actual theft of assets occurred here. The big $5,000,000 number boils down to some Korean dudes spoofing their credentials to get a job, and... that's the money they got paid to do their jobs. That's not theft—that's the same thing thousands of Americans do every day to juke their way into bullshit remote IT jobs. This is only newsworthy because the perfidious oriental enemy combatants did it, and there's only "damages" because now they have to harden their cyber-defenses against the sinister specter of communism.

The $900,000 "crypto" "theft" is just some crypto-bro grifters getting out-grifted. Haw haw!

A Hexbear user who deleted their account, then went on to shoot the CEO of United Health Care. He is still in hiding at an undisclosed Russian safe house. Luigi is just a fall guy.

What this clearly socialist-biased article fails to mention is that when he committed his grave table crimes, he did them...

Musliamically!

WITH TERRORISTIC INTENT IN HIS HEART!

Ourdoor cat Hexbears stay losing.

In video game design this would be called "emergent storytelling".

As big brain savant auteur genius Todd Howard says, environmental storytelling is when there's skeletons in toilets. The more skeletons in toilets there are, the deeper your lore is.

This is why Death Road to Canada is the Citizen Kane of roguelikes.

Sounds made up. The government says teeth are luxury bones, so universal healthcare doesn't cover them.

That's fucked up, assuming the news is accurate. I know the original source includes some nerds at Radio Free Asia, so I have doubts, but this sounds like it's got a kernel of truth to it.

I'd love to hear some non-western reporting on this one. Some BBC dork in Hong Kong doesn't count.

I highly recommend watching Terminal Montage videos with captions on, by the way. You get some very educational content courtesy of the NHTSA!

Oh, heavens no! They're just hoping the fascists will feel really bad before they themselves pass the fascists' budget.

This is worse than Khrushchev's corn cob party in Stalingrad!