old soviet joke:
Dr. Chen (Owner of 陈博士 Herbal Tea Drinks) and Todd Chodewick (Owner of ColoRado Iced Tea) met at a trade fair.
Todd said, "Dr. Chen. man, we are totes different. While I come from a humble surfing class background, you are from the privileged TCM professional class."
Dr. Chen replied, "Yes, but we are also similar, in that we are both class traitors."
"PAVLOU? THAT IS A NAME FROM THE THALASSONIKIAN PENINSULA. YOU ARE NOT WHITE.
CW:
going to wash my hands after typing this 
spoiler
YOU ARE A LAMB ROAST, SWEATY WITH THE ODOR OF GARLIC. YOUR ANCESTORS WERE BEIGE MEN DRESSED IN TOGAS, OBSESSED WITH TURGID MATHEMATICS, OMPHALOSKEPSIS AND PÉDERASTIE, CLINGING TO COMPETITIVE ATHLETICS IN A FEEBLE ATTEMPT TO DISPLAY MASCULINITY. YOUR RACE IS ENDOMORPHIC AND LETHARGIC. THEIR IDEA OF CULTURE IS EATING OVERRIPE FIGS AND DRINKING SPICED AL-GHUL."