Ye ye, thank you. That's approximately the strat I have been using.
I'm just working on the Big Lie that covers for my mental breakdown and subsequent 4-5 years of unemployment. Or a collection of fabrications to rewrite history a little bit. It's a slow burn process because I'm just not quite ready yet but it has to be sooner than later.
Such a great post btw. You are a gem.
Was pressured into more body modification than was strictly necessary to solve my dysphoria. Gender essentialists like I said. Ya feel me?
I don't want to get too into the details cuz it would sound more fucked up than it really is.
Neat. I'm hitting that save post button on your original comment now, because I realise like, just reading what you wrote gave me hope that I can probably succeed enough to stop feeling like a total waste of love and resources. It's a terrible mentality but I can't seem to reorganise my mind in a healthier way.
Anyway the point I was originally going to make is you already helped me with your post, but my suggestion that you could effort post comes from a feeling that you have the right tools and perspective to help a lot of other posters manage the mindfuck of doing job applications and interviews etc.
You should feel no obligation to do so though. Like I said you already helped me. Thank you.
And so begins the third great meme war. I'm tired, but if we must fight let it be to the end this time.
I have this comedy bit that intruded into my head based on shaking hands with men who clearly don't think shaking hands with a woman makes any kind of logical sense so they do the bone crusher move.
The bit is that, they are assaulting me and I respond as such, headbutting them in the face and going complete racoon mode on them while they're just stunned that I have broken the unspoken rules of office decorum.
I'm a bit worried that I have cackled to myself so much over this, and made other people laugh from sharing it (it flows better when I verbalise it) that I will one day actually do this just to see what happens.
edit: oh and the reason I find this "funny" is that I very seriously believe they are intentionally covertly causing me pain and damage, so it would be a legitimate self defense argument when I finally end up in front of a judge.
You should write an effortpost of protips and hacks. I do this stuff fairly naturally for someone who's pretty neuro divergent, or I used to, I crashed out bad and am NEETing and terrified of re-entering the workforce in case it destroys what is left of my sanity.
haha sorry you just caught a stray from office bantz here at CIA psyop HQ, it wasn't personal. Someone was doing a bit.
I went extremely low contact with my lib parents who paid for my transition because their gender essentialism and my mother's narcissism were so toxic that I was taking heavy damage.
they are well meaning and act out of love but the way they are wired and the pair of them together, their toxic dynamic, produces abuse.
I had to fall back on them for support and they stepped up, caught me again when I fell. I cannot harbor serious resentment against them for being who they are, but I have to work very hard to maintain this relationship in a positive light, I realised not too long ago that despite all their best efforts the harms they had caused me meant that I would have nothing nice to say at my mother's funeral and I decided I didn't like that, and have been trying to consciously rebuild our relationship and enforce boundaries etc. It is so fucking tiring.
If I were able to survive without them I probably would not put in the work. I think we've all sacrificed for each other so it's sort of "even" now even if I'm cPTSD and even more dysphoric and dysmorphic and over-modified from their bullshit help.
It is totally fucking valid to just not do this work. I am operating out of survival mode and bitter acceptance that I have to be with these people.
It's so complicated and fucked up I doubt this post will even make any sense at all.
If you can go it alone do not feel guilt or any other kind of whackness about being your own person and setting the boundaries you need to be mentally healthy and to survive and thrive.
I dunno what to believe or not believe regarding DPR, but yes there are allegations of that for sure.
I just hate seeing a nerd locked up for facilitating drug dealing by co-opting CIA tech.
Yeah, go offline king.
r/cth and hb taught me to just shut the fuck up and listen to better educated socialists. I think more anarchists need to do this.
(Not intended as a shitpost or irony btw.)
You too. You've clearly been down this path and found your way. I admire this. Well done. I see you.