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Returning Jesus Christ Downed By U.S. Missile Defense 30,000 Feet Before Making Landfall (theonion.com)

submitted 2 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 37 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (3 children)

No, that wouldn't be how it would happen, he'd be hit by Israel's as he'd want to visit home first.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 months ago (1 children)

And they would then say that he was a terrorist in hiding and that they had every right to shoot him down.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 months ago

Isn't that why they executed him the first time?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

Nothing would make me laugh harder than Jesus Christ being Iron Domed

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 months ago (1 children)

False. He isn't coming back. Certainly most have heard the reason:

Aliens visit Earth, meet with various leaders of the world. They meet with the Pope, who of course tries to tell them of Christianity.

Pope: “You know of Jesus already?” Alien: “Of course we do. He visits regularly.”

Pope: “He’s only been here once. We are still awaiting His Second Coming!”

Alien: “Wow! When He came to us, we had a big party and gave Him our chocolate to try. He loved it and keeps coming back. What did you lot do to Him?”

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

I too read that chapter of the Martian Chronicles. Love that book

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

Is anyone thinking of the markets. If the rapture is here I don't what my 401k messed up again this week.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

Mushroom cloud of glory.