Movies & TV

Comic book nerd: "Look, right here on page 52 of the August 1983 issue of Captain America World Crisis Hjorkajork Invasion (third in of the 52-issue series), it shows Cap wearing the Indivisibility Ring on his MIDDLE finger, not his RING finger; the canon reason for that is probably the injury he sustained fighting the Chartreuse Calavera in Alternate Universe Capitano Mexico's Foiled Fiesta, spring of '78. Cap took a burritorang straight to his hand that would definitely have left him with some recurring tendonitis. Your HAVE TO move the ring, IT'S A CRITICAL CALLBACK that HINTS AT Capitano Mexico's possible return from the Null Zone!"

Comic book illustrator: "Dude, '83, huh? Yeah, that was definitely before I dried out. Probably an absinthe year, I think. I put the ring on his middle finger, huh? Sheee-it, go figure."

200,000 Deadpool & Wolverine slopfests are ready, with a million more well on the way

POV you're an Hollywood writer

it is 2024 and fandoms have more power than industrial unionism. the Fandom Relations Act of 2026 will make it illegal to use media to challenge any conceptions whatsoever

Is everyone ready for the worst shows and movies ever made?

Imagining a room full of sweaty dinguses telling some suit "don't put women in the game, but if you do make them hot, but not hot like a super model, no they can't look like real women, it's gotta be hot like a Bratz doll, y-yeah and big ol' titties too, the smaller the boobs the more WOKE it is and WOKE is BAD."

All four images look practically the same to me. Turns out what fans of each individual franchise wants is for none of them to be distinguishable from the others.

Phyrexians starting to look almost too on-the-nose.

Ahhhhhhhhhh i am going to keep screaming ahhhhhhhhh

This is 100% a result of gamergate teaching that they can use harassment, doxxing, and outright terrorism. Fuckers just pulled it on Helldivers and ruined my beautiful space fascism simulator.

And now these losers and going to proactively capitulate to actual, literal mob violence for some fucking reason. Good luck, dorks. Those hate campaigns aren't about getting what you want, they're about the joy of wielding power and hurting people.

Expect whiter casts and every woman replaced by someone younger with bigger boobs.

The slop will pander harder and harder and the treat hogs will feel a sort of vague discontent and not quite be sure where it's coming from because they can't accept that they actually need to be challenged once in a while to get any sort of stimulation so the ennui will probably just get worse while "DEI" or whatever it's called next is blamed all the same.

FINALLY. Nintendo needs to hire me so I can assign the appropriate genitals to ALL of the pokemon. I will work for CHEAP.

So like a focus group?

Horrible, just horrible

Don't make what the audience wants, show the audience that they actually want what you made

They should hire me. I'd strongly push for what matters: introducing Goku as a character into every franchise. This fan demands it!!

Wait, so I could get paid to talk shit to shareholders all day?

the fans

The answer is always "if you do that, fans are going to retaliate."

Make a good movie, make a bad movie. Movie has woman, movie doesn't have woman. Movie is exactly like the original, movie is a radical departure. Movie is for kids, movie is grim dark. It doesn't matter.

They could micro target to the most narrow, least appreciative audience and make no money so there's always that

oh thank god theres nothing scarier than the prospect of accidentally encountering an organic idea that is even slightly challenging or unexpected

I’ve read enough shitty fan fictions to know that giving the fans that much power never ends well.

This is the exact thing that killed RTS as a genre and I'm not joking. Most companies that developed RTS's would consult with E-sports players about what their RTS should have and how it should function. The resulting product would be one made for a very narrow niche of twitch streamers and "hardcore" gamers.

That said you should have people that are passionate about the source material work on the project. That doesn't mean you will get something good or true to the source (looking at you Watchmen) but it's probably something that's more likely to be that

oh, good! Hire Diegetic Essentialists! Surely, nothing bad can come from this!

ᶦᵐ ᵍᵒᶦⁿᵍ ᵗᵒ ᶠᵘᶜᵏᶦⁿᵍ ˡᵒˢᵉ ᶦᵗ

yayyyy slop feedback-loop

I at least want every adaptation of a thing to have some nerd who has at least read the wiki for whatever thing

like idk, it's shitty when people who know literally fuck dick all about something you like tries to make an adaptation of it, because it will suck all ass

or shit like the Foundation tv show where the showrunner just wanted to do their own fucking sci fi bullshit and they just used the IP as a vehicle for it