NTAH. If they had told you they were using the men's stall as well, then maybe. It sounds like they didn't do a good job at explaining the situation.
this post was submitted on 26 Oct 2023
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AmITheAsshole
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YTA. It's a penury situation. And you're enforcing a privilege.
Fortunately foe you women are used to this, which is why they didn't complain after you ignored them.
what sort of privilege were I enforcing?
The privilege of taking a restroom for yourself while everyone is waiting for its turn. When you have a right that other people don't have, it's a privilege.
wouldn't you say then that the girls were enforcing the privilage of using men's toilet due to no men at the station (before I arrived)?
That's not what a privilege is.
Do you ever use a handicapped stall? Would you allow a handicapped person in front of you in the queue?
You'll say yes, "because they have special needs". But that's an inappropriate judgement. Many don't. But you'd still let them ahead, right? Why?
Because we're a society of rules and customs. There are times that it's important to break those rules and make a point to use your privilege to stand up to power. That time is not in a random queue where power isn't even watching. If anything, he should have gone afterwards to complain that the restrooms aren't gender neutral. But going to the back of the queue would just be performative nonsense and change nothing. It would be white knighting to make the ladies feel better about their oh-so-poor existence.
Tip your fedora and move on son.
It's not about fighting for any cause. It's about not making the world a shitty place. Every time you act like a selfish asshole, you make the world a shittier place. That's all there is.
The gendered restrooms is about comfort. But at some point, comfort get in the way, so you scrap the useless rules.
I have been in handicapped restroom. I never had a case of a handicapped guy bypassing the queue for it, but if there was a big queue and he would do it, he would be an asshole.
You can be selfish and individualistic, or you can try to not be an asshole.
Forcing a handicapped person, who might have significantly different and more urgent needs than the rest of us, to wait on the queue is making the world shittier. So if that's your metric, work on that.
"might have significantly different and more urgent needs"... You know, a specific situation can always be dealt with specific solutions. Where I live we're civilized people, we can discuss these things. Like you could also talk about a wounded person or a pregnant woman.
But unless specified, a handicapped person is a normal person that can wait in the queue like everyone.
Or it can be like so many people here: an asshole that will enforce its privilege to the expanse of everyone else.
NTA. They might have decided to take over both toilets, it was a shitty move on their part and they can fuck off. This is a gas station, not their sports locker.
Uh.. Yeah.. The door opened and it was another girl in there proving they were in fact all in line for both. You cut in line.
In this case, if he did get in line and when he was in front of the line, would it be acceptable for him to use the women's stall if the men's was occupied? I suspect that would not go without objection, but I could be assuming wrong. That would be pretty unfair if they were using the men's.