this post was submitted on 21 Nov 2023
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Microblog Memes

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[–] [email protected] 69 points 2 years ago (2 children)

This why I like the origin of vampires being Judas’ failed suicide attempt. Explains the silver allergy, too.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 86 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (3 children)

I forget which movie it's from, but they said the first vampire was Judas. He tried to hang himself after he betrayed Jesus but just before he died the branch broke at sunset and he became a vampire.

Explains the blood - since he can't have communion - and the silver - because he sold Jesus out for silver talents (money) - and the hatred of lower-case t, and the aversion to sunlight.

[–] [email protected] 45 points 2 years ago (1 children)

And the branch is the stake that kills them!?

[–] [email protected] 36 points 2 years ago (4 children)

Yep!

Don't know where the garlic comes in, though

[–] [email protected] 58 points 2 years ago (1 children)

JC served garlic bread at the last supper. It's the only way.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 2 years ago (1 children)

And this is my body, with little Caesars garlic butter sauce

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

Papa John's or GTFO

[–] [email protected] 32 points 2 years ago

He just hated it

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago

Reminds him of the Romans?

[–] bingbong 6 points 2 years ago

He's just a food snob

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 years ago

Ooh, I like this

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 years ago

Dracula 2000 I wanna say was the movie.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 years ago

Or like in Vampire the Masquerade how Cain was the original vampire