in all nine species of female snakes they examined
I'm sure they actually did the study in an organized way, but I imagined them checking the snake species one by one. "Okay guys, that's eight out of eight so far. If the next snake also has a clit, we're calling it - all snakes have clits."
"Welcome! What brings you to the homeless shelter today?"
"Well, it's that bench. You see, I was choosing the unhoused lifestyle, and I was fine with all the other stigma and physical discomforts, until I realized that the city wants to discourage my presence in public spaces. Fuck these armrests, I decided I'd just come to this shelter, get treatment for my addiction, get counseling for my traumatic past that fed the addiction, get an education, get a job, rent a house, save money, then buy a home instead. It's just not worth trying to get comfy on that bench."