oh wait yeah you did answer me lmao
so physical but minimal on the emotional side of it
~~typical~~ I may know someone to introduce to you..
I think it's cute to wear matching outfits when they're like seniors though, no?? xD
I don't know, "check in" sounds so.. I don't know. Almost formal and separated. Of course, in my head I'm thinking these two people are living together. If they were, it's natural to ask "want chinese for dinner?" stuff like that. I don't know if that's called checking in though. It's only natural to communicate your day to day stuff.
If living apart though.. probably once daily on a minimum, yeah. But not like "what you had for lunch" coz i mean who cares right, after 1242342 lunches. But I do think anything less than that, relo is probably not a priority for them at that point. It shouldn't feel like work. Aaaaaaaand if you need so much private space that you need to lock everyone out including someone you're supposed to love.. that just means that your work/life is out of whack... but I suspect you know that. :x
TL;DR: Emotional security me thinks.
Never had anyone in my life I could depend on whilst growing up besides my bestie but I mean we also live separate lives so in the end it can end up still feel like I'm on my own. I've come to accept that I can be weak and that it's okay to lean on someone sometimes. Pretty much didn't feel like I had a family growing up either, so never liked being home. After moving out and living on my own for a while, I realised how much happiness and peace it gives me to come home to someone who loves and cares for me.
I have lots of love to give too, seemingly bottomless, at the risk of sounding pretentious! I give strangers the benefit of doubt and get burned quite a lot due to that me thinks (just as an individual to another individual, I'm not passing hyatt around like a drink okay, hah!). I'd much rather pour all this love to someone who would pour it back into me too. Someone to have my back, who believes in me and sees the best version of me that I probably never could see in myself.
In return, I do think I can provide extremely good emotional support! I'm very independent so I can hold my own (maybe even theirs) on other aspects in life.
I can't with the good mornings and the good nights either. I consider that part of small talk and I just can't stand empty chatter for the sake of it. I'd much rather be sent a funny meme that reminded them of me tbh.
In my previous long term, I noticed that I could go about two days without needing to check in with them, and when he does come over, we don't really chatter much about our day to day either; just enjoy existing in the same space together, doing separate things.
I used to compare with other couples and wonder if we actually enjoy each other's company.
Your current situation sounds extremely promising though! I do think that comparison is a thief of joy. You don't need to always have fun activities and constantly engage each other to be "loving" me thinks. If you're happy, you're happy. Don't let other people (including yourself) think otherwise!
I think I can still do all that! It's marathons and outdoor mountain climbing that I ~~can't~~ don't like 😂
I guess my age is very telling; I forgot you can't do much with MYR100 these days :/
On point 4 though, at what point is it too pre-mature to discuss or manage expectations? Like how detailed or how vague should we be? :/
Well, just think about it. If that is in fact true, then statistically, all conventionally "ugly" and fat people would never get married and reproduce. Even disfigured people find somebody and gets married. On the other hand, I watch lots of reality TV shows (more than I'd like to admit) and even conventionally "hot" people go though years of dry spells too.
We might have higher standards, and if that is the case, then we would definitely have to work on ourselves. But if it's not sustainable/just put on in order to attract who you want, it wouldn't last long either. In the end, a person has to love you for you.
all so hot
as in sweaty hot
wait-
Hmm you still haven't answered my question tho. What are you seeking out of this relationship, emotionally ~~and physically~~?
What are you seeking out of a relationship? I can't really wrap around my head a relationship that can go on days without checking in. Feels like you're still very much talking about relos long-distance style, or also possibly living apart.
I mean, if you guys lived together, talking once a couple of days would be a problem, me thinks, haha ^^"
relationship-related projects
bruh even paktor also project based @.@
I'll PM you about it