bottom surgery/laser stuff (cw: bottom dysphoria mention)
i've decided that i want to start prepping for bottom surgery. i've been researching clinics here and overseas, looking at health insurance, figuring out what other prep i have to do, etc. for the last few weeks. while i think i could get better results for about the same cost in Thailand, i think i would be more comfortable being able to do recovery at home and avoiding flights/accomodation
since that's the case, i'll need to have top cover insurance for 12 months before the surgery - which lines up with the 12 months (minimum?) of recommended hair removal. i got the insurance sorted earlier in the week and thought that i may as well start getting laser done too (clinic said that a course of laser along with electrolysis to finish up should suffice). i spent a couple hours shaving the area yesterday and jesus christ, i felt like complete shit and had nicked myself a few times too (if anyone has advice for shaving their girl balls do tell). i've been able to keep the bottom dysphoria at manageable levels but, since it's the only thing i've been thinking about lately, it's been getting a bit worse
anyways, i was anxious as fuck for the laser - despite the girls there being wonderful for my normal face/bikini sessions - but i explained the situation and it all went very normally. i didn't get charged anything on top of my bikini cost and the laser tech was lovely the entire time, she even talked about her own struggles with getting Brazilian laser done. so, i'll keep up the hair removal, pay for a psych to give their approval for what i do with my body, and maybe be posting about having a vag in 12+ months time if all goes to plan! i can't wait to abuse the fuck out of my job's gender affirmation leave too
ooh i wanted to read this last year but didn't get around to it and now i've finished the first chapter! this part got me thinking:
i wonder if i still would have rejected my imposed gender so harshly if i hadn't seen it performed in such a consistently abusive way. feeling society trying to groom me to become that eventually reached a boiling point and it was hard not to outright hate any performance of that "normal sexuality" which was expected of me
thanks for doing this and please add me to the ping list if you could! ❤️