avalokitesha

Maybe there already lies another reason for the lower salaries - if you are from a country which traditionally had your company actually appreciate their employees and make them feel valued, and historically you just had to land your job and could expect to stay with the company the rest of your life, you will not be actively looking unless you get laid off. Loyalty on both sides is still quite common where I live.

Social security. Strong protection against lay-offs. University without paying upfront - just because you don't care for it as someone who didn't grow up here, doesn't mean it's not a benefit for the majority. Healthcare at affordable prices. Public transport.

The thing is, you only see your own benefit. And I feel that's a very typical way of looking at life in the US. The state is not here to rob you, but to provide you with a structure to live in that you couldn't have in the same way on your own. Public transport may not be something you need, but what about the elderly? What about the people who can't drive for whatever reason?

What if you have an accident that renders you unable to work? It doesn't even need to be your fault. Someone might loose control over their car and you might get hit. People like that need strong social nets, and people who can work finance them. Elderly people need those. They are often sick (high health care costs) and not longer able to drive (public transport) and if their pension is not enough, the social security kicks in and supports them.

You personally may not be profiting from it right now, but there's a ton of security built into the system for everyone that gets financed by everyone according to their means.

Isn't the question rather "why do US companies do that" when they could get away with paying less?

I can only speak for myself but I'm not keen on constantly job-hunting like I see so many US engineer advise. I'm looking for a more stable situation where the company seeks to hire long-term, and often in those cases you get benefits that are not monetary. Free access to partnered places like fitness studios or swimming pools can't really be rolled into your salary, but if you use those often you end up with a financial benefit too. Automatical raises when your child is born is another.

Maybe it's just a different culture, but I'll trade in some base salary for a work environment based on mutual trust and goodwill.

This right here. I'll gladly take less pay in Europe than constantly having to worry about my health and whether or not that bit of pain you sometimes have in a weird area means a hospital bill you can't afford. And even if I loose my job, I know I will not starve, because of our social security system. It will not be fun, but I won't loose my house or worry about what to eat tomorrow just because I got unlucky and my company went under.

As someone with ASD, the difference it makes when you know your sensory issues and are able to get accommodation for it is insane.

I just started a new job where I am open about it and my officemates love that I love the "dark" spot away from the windows. Now they don't have to sit there. For me, the peace and quiet of that place means my stress level is so low for the first time in my life that I struggle to go to sleep at night.

My "go to sleep" indicator has been mental stress, but my job allows my to hyperfocus, which is recharging my mental batteries. I'm left alone to do my thing unless there is a meeting that's been announced way before or I reach out to others.

When I get home from work, I may be physically tired, but mentally I could just go on, because the basic level of stress that was at like 70% all my life is so much lower now. Now I have to learn how to recognize when I physically need to sleep - and fight my brain on it, because it just wants to play...

Long story short: my diagnosis for ASD changed my life, for the better. But there are many factors to consider (state of healthcare is a big one, accessibility of therapy, possible legal ramifications in your country, social acceptance, but alse how much it affects you).

For me, ASD helped me make sense of what was happening and allowed me to pushback when others were calling me lazy. But what helped me was mostly therapy work, and if you have a good therapist, you can just work on those issues separately. Imho you can get the help you need for ASD without a diagnosis, but in my situation the diagnosis was a massive help.

I mean, it controls us like having blonde or brown or black hair controls us. Trying to act as if you have another hair color requires immense effort and resources and might damage your hair - think of a dark brown-haired person trying to appear blonde and have nobody notice.

You have to continuously dye so people won't see roots. That will damage your hair really badly. You will have to bleach your pubes. Either shave or bleach all your body hair. Your eye-brows. And even then: if you have darker skin, people will doubt blonde is your real hair color, because they know it's a rare (or impossible) combination. Also, bleached hair never has the variety of color tones natural hair has. For blondes, single hairs can be reddish, light brown, really white blonde etc, and it's the mix that makes blonde.

You can never pass as a natural blonde when you bleach your hair unless people are inattentive. Yet no one complains about someole being a brunette controling them...

I feel that is also true for being autistic. It requires enormous effort to appear NT, it will never be perfect or natural, and it is very damaging to your mental health.

Autsim is not an accessory or something that can disappear. It is a fundamental part of who we are, at least in my book. (others may disagree, but I met more autistic people who agree with this.)

I tried to imagine myself as non-autistic, and I just couldn't. I love my special interests, and my passion for learning. My literalness has given me a great sense of humor. What would I be without them? A different person, and probably a very boring one.

You can't untangle the person from autism. Autism is how my brain is wired. It does affect my personality because of that, and I get so mad (and fad for the kid!) at the same time when I hear parents talk about their real kid being trapped inside the autism cage or whatever word they use. Those parents will never be able to see their kid for who they are, they will always see them as deficient compared to who they imagined their kid to be.

Oh you got me steaming until I read the last line 😂 well done!

Same!

My routine still makes me open rif before I even notice :(

But it seems a lot of my communities I followed on reddit for my professional area don't seem fazed at all and I don't find much other places for that area, so I probably am stuck at reddit for the foreseeable future :( at least lemmy doesn't seem to have any.