Mehrunes_Laser

Hahahaha yeah why would anyone do that

I can only speak from personal experience. I process the world in much the same way. I find something neat, learn everything I can, then inevitably get bored a few months later. But I recently had the realization that I've been receding into hyper fixations to distract from the very real sources of depression in my life.

I would find myself feeling vaguely sad or unfulfilled and instead of addressing the source, I immediately dive into the minutiae of whatever I'm fixated on at the moment. Thinking to myself "surely I'll feel more fulfilled once I've figured out this software." Or "Won't it feel great when I'm done with this project?!".

But I never do feel fulfilled anymore. The sadness has never gone away. It's always been there, just out of sight. I'm surrounded by a graveyard of distractions.

Well, based on personal experience, I can tell you that some chemical dependency and spiralling mental health won't fix it. So I'm fresh out of ideas.

Oh yeah for sure. Throw some pot and booze in there and you've got a party. I'll never need to address just how bad things have gotten.

ADHD is great if you're depressed and don't know it or don't want to admit it. You can just distract yourself by going from one dopamine fix to the next while the color slowly drains from your world. It also gives you the ability to ignore all the signs since you can hyper focus on literally anything else.

So this is dysphoria? Shit sucks. I guess my egg has been thoroughly cracked.

I've used that script and can confirm it works. I was actually coming into this thread to recommend it. I don't think there is anything nefarious in that script. Or at least I haven't had anything bad happen on the machine I used it on. I suppose someone with more knowledge could look through the script to see if anything looks out of place.

Burgerland has fallen.

Re-replying to this just to say that the last two weeks of my life have been consumed by Assetto Corsa and all it's amazing mods. The free-roams are great, but the vintage cars and tracks are what have been occupying all my time. Trying to cut a clean and fast lap around Battenbergring in an Alfa 33 has consumed all my free time.