this post was submitted on 02 Nov 2023
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Sausage Rules (slrpnk.net)
submitted 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
 
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[–] [email protected] 31 points 2 years ago (2 children)

The fuck even went wrong with them?! This has to be intentional. Meat doesn’t stretch when it gets cooked

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

You’re right, I guess I can only say that when I put my penis in the oven at 350 for 20 min, it doesn’t grow. In fact, it gets smaller and very red and tender

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

I thought so as well. Maybe the other side of the protruding sausages were progressively squeezed out by the dough starting from the tip, and it's probably due to the proximity to other rolls in the back, or maybe the center of the oven was much hotter and ended up cooking (and growing) the dough unevenly. That explains why the tip of the sausages looks popped.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Stop setting unrealistic expectations for sausage rolls! These are also beautiful, and their feelings are valid! Not all sausage rolls are taut and perky and you should acknowledge that!

/s obviously, but this is the interwebs

[–] [email protected] 23 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

Michael Jackson?

[–] [email protected] 20 points 2 years ago (2 children)

I'd assume the logical way to eat that is with your hand. I feel like your choices are to manhandle the dangler and eat the bread first, or, you can hold it by the bread and fight the wiggler into your mouth. Both feel equally silly, but I'm down.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

And I'm down bad

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

The only real choice here is to Nancy Reagan the entire wiggly bit all at once

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago

She was the glizziest of gladiators from 1921 - 2016

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 years ago

Some oven timers go “ding.”

Others go “dong.”

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 years ago

OMG, those poor horses!

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 years ago

I believe these are called "show-ers and growers".

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago

"Ow you're bending it!"

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago

The joke is they look like penises

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago

Kane Lynch's character in Role Models would have a field day with these

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

These are so popular that they already have a theme song.

Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago

The gooiest duck 🦪🍌

[–] dangblingus 1 points 2 years ago

The hell are they baking beneath the dicks?