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Not dedicating my entire life to work.

When I was 24 I had a random breakdown. Came home from a completely normal, unexciting day of work, got some food out for dinner and out of nowhere just collapsed and cried. Was life really just work and distractions until the next day?

I spent a year making changes to my life. From diet to perspectives until I found an opportunity to travel. I gathered all my money, even withdrawing from my stocks I had lost half my money from due to the 2008 recession, and fucked right off. I was able to backpack around and lived in a couple countries for a few years.

I had so many experiences that it felt like I grew as an individual exponentially faster compared to all my friends and family back home. I'm happy I chose to live life for myself but I also recognize that I was in a position to do something that most people are not able to do. That's why I don't talk about it too much unless there's some relevancy to the current the conversation.

Had I stayed and spent my entire life working, I'd be a miserable old man that worked my body until it was broken only to have retired tired and in pain. I would have been unable to actually enjoy the life I would have worked so hard towards.

Other people seem to be concerned for my retirement with so little money saved. I'm not worried. My retirement plan is extreme sports. Whatever happens, happens. I lived a life on my own terms.

Not having kids. Don't like them, never wanted them, I'd be rubbish at it. There was a lot of pressure on me and I'm so glad I didn't do it!

I dunno.

I think probably the whole idea of chasing marriage early. There's some degree of pressure even now for young adults to pursue marriage as a goal. Which, if that's what you really want, go for it.

But I never saw marriage as something to chase for the sake of being married.

For me, it was and is about having a partner, a person who is the other half of me. The person is what matters, not the fact of being together.

I can't say whether or not things would have been better or worse had I been more actively seeking a spouse. I likely would have been a father sooner. I probably would have had less short term partners, and medium term ones as well.

But I also wouldn't have the life I have now. And while there's stuff I certainly wish I could magic away, the partner I have and our kid aren't on that list.

Because I wasn't chasing the idea of being part of a couple, when the right person came into my life, I was able to allow it to happen organically. The experiences in the past made me better prepared to do my part of things. It all made me a better partner than I would have been at 25 or even 30.