this post was submitted on 12 Sep 2023
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Memes

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[–] [email protected] 64 points 2 years ago (7 children)

Y'all need more fiber in ya life

[–] [email protected] 28 points 2 years ago (1 children)

My toilet paper is already practically a pillow, how many more fibers do you want?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 years ago (1 children)

It has to go through you!!!

[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I have IBS. Might as well ask us if we've tried yoga.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)

FYI, 'have you tried yoga?' In chronic illness speak means 'can I offer you unsolicited advice with the undertones of presuming that you have not tried to the best of your abilities to cure yourself of an incurable disease that has not even come close to be fully treatable?'

Not saying that's what OP said, just saying thats how it comes off to most non-chronic illness sufferers.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

Ok, but have you tried essential oils?

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Also water. If you eat a bunch of fiber without water... believe it or not, also constipation.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago (2 children)

No, he needs a squatty potty. I can’t believe nobody else in these comments has mentioned them.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Fuck, I forgot what a cult following those weird things have.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

It’s not a weird cult following? Humans have been squatting to shit for millennia. It’s just a return to our roots because it’s what works…

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago (2 children)

And how do you deal with corn then? 🌽

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

Wash it off and toss it in the next pot of chili!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Corn? I don't remember eating corn!

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[–] [email protected] 44 points 2 years ago (9 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 years ago

That's right, show that turd who's boss!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 years ago

Yeah, that's it! You show that turd who's boss.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (4 children)

(since nobody seems to know, this is a scene from the Prisoner, which is what "who does #2 work for" is a reference to)

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I'm pretty sure this is a reference to Austin Powers, where he's giving the Irish hitman a swirly in a casino bathroom and yelling "WHO DOES NUMBER 2 WORK FOR" while a gambler played by Tom Arnold in the next stall is trying to encourage him on.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 years ago (1 children)

You are correct. But what Austin Powers was referencing was this scene from The Prisoner. Top notch 60's TV!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

The mvp is in the comments of the comments

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago

That's not my bag, baby

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago

I AM NOT A NUMBER. I AM A FREE MAN!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Deep cut! I first heard of and saw that show in college. It's great!

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 2 years ago (1 children)

When you take your pants off mid-shit, you know it’s a life or death situation

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 years ago

Or when you preemptively take off your shirt.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Wait a sec... Is it me or did he forget to open the lid on the toilet?

[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 years ago

That's the fighting part

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 years ago

That's just the seat.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 years ago (1 children)

That's why we call it bathroom.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago

Speak for yourself.

I call it Badezimmer but for similar reasons

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 years ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago

I am convinced that of all the secrets of the world that the elder generations hadn’t passed onto us…taking a fiber supplement is the biggest improvement to daily life.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago (1 children)

True. Went to a farmers market and bought a bunch cuz they were cheap. Stupid ass me decided to eat then and there. Thirty minutes later I was blowing red lights to try to reach a safe place to drop der UberDeuce. I swore that the toilet was screaming at me for a week after that

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

Yeah, bananas help solidify it. They are also mildly antacid. I'll take that over fighting for my life after enjoying a tasty hot sauce!

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 years ago

I once was really tired in a mall and went to the (public) toilet just to sit my ass down and hide from people.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Can confirm. Have Crohn's.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 years ago

Can confirm. Have Crohn's, and I just stopped at home in the middle of my route because I couldn't hold it anymore...

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

Yeah, I have celiac and all I think when people reference epic toilet struggles is “hmm, either you don’t eat any fiber or… you may have a serious health problem”

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago

Im in this exact position while reading this.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago

Take the corn OFF the cob next time dumbass

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago

Because you won't eat your fresh veg.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

Oh that's exactly my position the morning after a "Hot ones" evening!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago

Its not called a restroom because of that, silly...

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