this post was submitted on 15 Aug 2024
103 points (99.0% liked)

chapotraphouse

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[–] [email protected] 83 points 10 months ago (4 children)

I read the comments. The OP says she asked her mother about the bean jar after making the thread. The mother said that whenever her and the father had sex they would place 1 bean into a mason jar to count the number of times they had sex.

[–] [email protected] 103 points 10 months ago (1 children)

This is exactly the lie I'd tell my child if they asked about my fuck beans.

[–] [email protected] 48 points 10 months ago

That's way more wholesome than what I had in mind.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 10 months ago (1 children)

What happens when the jar is filled?

[–] [email protected] 25 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 17 points 10 months ago

They make a new chilid

[–] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago

they were putting beans in their asses weren't they

[–] [email protected] 70 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Imagine being a full grown adult and not knowing how to fuck beans.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 10 months ago

it's hip to fuck beans

[–] [email protected] 52 points 10 months ago (1 children)

is this what the kids call bussy these days? bean pussy???

[–] [email protected] 19 points 10 months ago

here i am snortin like a pig

[–] [email protected] 52 points 10 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 23 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 25 points 10 months ago (1 children)

You solidarity Me

Boomer movie references

[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago (1 children)

damn.. never did watch that.. every time i tried to put the vhs in i was told i wasn't old enough yet

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

You should now that you're older. I think we're heading for a hellworld that's part Idiocracy and part Demolition Man.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago
[–] [email protected] 48 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago

this is what i assumed.. not sure what else they'd be

[–] [email protected] 38 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Urban dictionary: English breakfast

[–] [email protected] 32 points 10 months ago

They were jumping beans. Nature's vibrator

[–] [email protected] 25 points 10 months ago

This is kinda beansus

[–] [email protected] 25 points 10 months ago

Do not ask a question if you do not want to hear the answer...

[–] [email protected] 16 points 10 months ago

You put the beans in the foreskin as added stimulation.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago

Mom looks in the mood

Dad pulls out the beans

"Ooooh" she says, eyeing the can

Dad opens the beans and caresses their surfaces

Mom starts to move slowly back and forth

She looks him straight in the eye, regaining composure.

"Beanboozle me."

[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago

beanfucker

Death to America

[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago

The father lost the ability to nut in a tragic skiing accident. Now he pokes some beans into his pee hole in order to skeet the beans all over his wife's tiddies at the moment of climax. But why beans, you ask? Easier cleanup.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago

It's what we meanis about beanis