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Two guys are getting drunk... (lemm.ee)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

NSFW 2 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Drunk #1: Pukes all over himself, "goddamn it!" he says.

Drunk #2: "What's the big deal, man? You always puke on yourself."

Drunk#1: "Yeah, I know, but my old lady said if I come home with puke on me again, not to bother coming home."

Drunk #2 thinks for a minute, and says: "I have an idea. Take a $20 bill, put it in your shirt pocket, and tell her someone else threw up on you, and he felt so bad about it, he gave you $20 for your trouble."

Drunk#1 says, "that's a great Idea, it might just work!"

Later, Drunk#1 finally staggers home, tries the door to his house and finds it locked. After banging on the door, the wife answers, but keeps the chain on. She says: "Goddamn it, George, I can smell you from here! What the fuck did I tell you about comming home covered in puke?"

"I know, I know, Vera, but this time it wasn't me."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Another dude puked on me, but he felt so bad he gave me $20. It's right here," he says while patting his shirt pocket.

With a doubtful look, Vera reaches over, delicately as she can, avoiding as much vomit as possible. With bemused surprise, pulls the paper out. "Why is there $40 here?"

"Oh yeah, he shit in my pants too."

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

@[email protected]
To answer your other question, no this is not shadowbanned or anything, you probably unchecked "show read posts" in your settings.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

I had to select "show NSFW", thanks!