Would You Rather

Bonus question: what if both options are for warfare in WWIII?

They follow you everywhere and will mysteriously appear whenever you're sure you've shaken them. If they die while in your care then you turn into that animal.

The hen's poop contains all the normal pathogens and smells, it also enjoys shoulder rides and isn't afraid to peck you. The snake will eat things it cannot digest if you don't stop it and will occasionally try to eat things it cannot even swallow.

The hen enjoys talking about cocks while the snake is vocal about its rather questionable political views.

Have a self-cleaning kitchen, where dishes, pots, and pans wash and put themselves away, but you have to manually fold and put away all laundry for the rest of your life or have a self-folding and putting away laundry system, where your clothes are always neatly folded and in your drawers, but you have to scrub and wash all dishes, pots, and pans by hand for the rest of your life.

The purgatory is a perfectly self-contained 10-acre plot of land that you create limited mostly by your imagination, but you're cut off from the world and other people.

The internet connection is stable, but you lack a physical body and cannot upgrade the machine hosting you - your hardware will become out of date fairly quickly.

Honestly, no offence, but I don't wanna be a woman. That sounds like a difficult life.

Don't worry about control or being unable to react in time etc or how it affects you physically.

You can only choose one and lose another

I'm honestly not sure which I would choose. Both sound incredibly inconvenient.

I want food honestly. I enjoy sleeping, its time my mind isnt conscious and that's a positive for us all.

Since I posted some weirder ones, here's one that's a treat. I like both so much I can't choose.