Dad Jokes

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6 users here now

Description

This is a community for sharing those cheesy “dad” jokes that invoke an eye roll or chuckle.

Rules

Clean jokes only please. If you cannot tell this joke to a 5-year-old, you probably shouldn’t post it here. Please post edgier jokes to [email protected]
Must post text, image (e.g., meme), or direct link. Do not post external links that cannot be viewed directly from the community (e.g., link to joke website, Facebook, Instagram, etc.)
Follow Lemmy.World Code of Conduct

founded 2 years ago

MODERATORS

[email protected]

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67

Post text, images, or direct links only (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 years ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

5 comments fedilink

Please see the updated sidebar. Do not post external links to websites such as Facebook and Instagram.

2

183

Please post edgier jokes to the new Uncle Jokes community (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 years ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

12 comments fedilink

I just updated the sidebar. As a rule of thumb, if you cannot tell this joke to a 5-year-old, you should probably post it to the new community [email protected]

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A delicacy (media.piefed.world)

submitted 3 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

8 comments fedilink

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49

Boneless Battle 🦴 (lemmy.zip)

submitted 4 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

3 comments fedilink

Why don’t skeletons fight each other? … They don’t have the guts

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133

I bought a thesaurus the other day but when I went to use it all the pages were blank... (lemmy.world)

submitted 5 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

2 comments fedilink

I have no words to describe how angry I was...

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203

What's the difference between Iron Man and Aluminum Man? (lemmy.world)

submitted 6 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

13 comments fedilink

Iron Man stops the bad guys, Aluminum Man foils them.....

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455

There are signs (piefedimages.s3.eu-central-003.backblazeb2.com)

submitted 1 week ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

2 comments fedilink

8

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Previously On... (woodendice.org)

submitted 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

4 comments fedilink

Pretty proud of this one.

Alt text: A masculine voice announces "Previously on" and then replaces the cap on a baby's bottle before saying "Sorry, just doing the recap."

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Dad goals (i.imgur.com)

submitted 1 week ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

1 comments fedilink

cross-posted from: https://sh.itjust.works/post/43341810

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What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? (feddit.online)

submitted 1 week ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

8 comments fedilink

Tap for spoiler

I don't know and I don't care.

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90

Why don't penguins worry about polar bears? (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

5 comments fedilink

They're polar opposites.

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Garak Todd: The Demon Barbour of Promenade Parkway (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

2 comments fedilink

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/33757730

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68

Rene Decartes walked into a cafe and ordered a glass of wine. (lemmy.ca)

submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

1 comments fedilink

The waiter asked, "Do you want something to eat with that?" He replied, "I think not." The poor guy disappeared.

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I Was Offered A Job At The Fishmonger's... (lemmy.ca)

submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

9 comments fedilink

...But I'm afraid I can't fillet.

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Odds Are Slim That I'll Ever Visit A Casino... (lemmy.ca)

submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

11 comments fedilink

...but I won't roulette out entirely.

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What do you often find Punny? (sa.torishiro.com)

submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

1 comments fedilink

cross-posted from: https://torishiro.com/notes/aas0771oukb100sr

What do you often find Punny?

@[email protected] #maths #jokes

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Chuckle (piefed.cdn.blahaj.zone)

submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

1 comments fedilink

cross-posted from: https://piefed.blahaj.zone/post/192811

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I Bought A Wig Today For Only A Dollar. (lemmy.ca)

submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

2 comments fedilink

It was a small price toupée.

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77

I don't like Orion's Belt. (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

6 comments fedilink

It's a complete waist of space.

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I'm a huge fan of tower clocks. (lazysoci.al)

submitted 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

0 comments fedilink

…brace for impact…

Big time.

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Inside of you there are two wolves, according to proverb. (lazysoci.al)

submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

3 comments fedilink

Inside of Mozart, however, there were, like, eleven or twelve.

…drum roll please…

That's why he was called Wolfgang.

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My sister got mad and threw my phone out the window. (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 3 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

3 comments fedilink

Joke's on her. It's in airplane mode.

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I like wild game, but I find moose tastes a lot like chocolate pudding. (lemmy.ca)

submitted 3 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

4 comments fedilink

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So this is math, is it? (lazysoci.al)

submitted 3 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

39 comments fedilink

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Exercise is imporant (lemmy.world)

submitted 3 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

3 comments fedilink

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/33318063