day drunk on a school night

Goodnight sweet hexbears

Anyone else remember this shitshow song the Brits made millions of children sing during brexit?

think ill self-date tomorrow, i've got a lot of cleaning to do and i haven't day drank in forever, so i'll like get drunk in the sun, cook, clean, shave my legs paint my nails

The Department of Defence has faced a Brisbane Magistrate over a charge of breaching federal workplace health and safety laws after two soldiers were mauled by a 2.5 metre crocodile in 2021.

Defence has been handed a 7000-page evidence brief after the two men narrowly survived being death-rolled in Far North Queensland.

Should probably start workshopping ways to explain my wariness around marital finances to any future life partner

"No honey I'm not planning to leave you, but both my parents were left destitute after costly divorce proceedings so if you could just sign that prenup 🙂🙂🙂"

The best thing about slowly learning Russian is that I can send sweet nothings to my partner like this:

Служу Советскому Союзу

gonna emulate a Pikmin game because I never got to play 'em

Is there anything to be done about excessively loud motor vehicles, or must I wait for the car rapture?

Just want to say that Arabic is such a fucking cool language I love it. Definitely making me regret having posted cring until now by only studying European Indo-European languages. Also to my neighbours, I hope you enjoy hearing me practise my emphatic consonants and ع while you are trying to sleep lmao

fuck landlords
fuck cars

LaRouche was very bad but we should actually build the Bering Strait train

Chat Pile is like if Disco Elysium was set in Oklahoma City

I would have been such a good journalist on 9/11

We would have gone back to air with me standing in front of the burning towers. I would have been all calm and professional, both stern and with my tie undone so you could tell we scrambled to arrive on scene.

"Ladies and gentlemen, (because there's only two genders) America is under attack". Then a shadow overhead and we nab some great footage of the second plane hitting. I would stare in shock for a moment, then a determined smirk would draw across my face. "I've got to save these people!" I would say directly to my cameraman Richard, who thinks I look great today and wishes I would act a bit sluttier around the office.

I would have gone into the towers and saved hundreds, maybe thousands of people all on camera. I would have been a hero but also I would have a lived, unlike those other idiots. I often wonder if Richard is happy with his life. He smiles around me in a way I don't see him smile around his wife. I've noticed he's been working out recently.

Anyway, up next: my interview with Klaus Barbie

scratched a mole hard enough to bleed while not paying attention last night, but now i can't do anything but think about it its not even itchy today but i wana tug on the scab

Bit idea:

i love watching really bad movies so i’ve had this on my radar for a while, but is passion of the christ as antisemitic as its sought out to be? i was planning on pirating but idk i don’t really want to watch something hateful

deleting your account once you get banned is the coward's way out

I just drank half of a 1.75 liter handle of vodka. I barely feel it. It's like I'm fucking sober. (See, I can even type!) Chugging more, really want to get out there, but scared I can't anymore.