Today I Fucked Up

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r/TIFU means Today I Fucked Up.

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This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Dry_Ticket_9548 on 2025-05-10 11:31:32+00:00.


I'm currently in full panic mode after realizing I've royally screwed up our family vacation planning, and I'm the designated "responsible one" who handles all the booking 🙃

Long story short: I managed to book flights for our family of 4 to arrive at our destination A WHOLE DAY before our hotel reservation starts. And now our main hotel is fully booked for that night, so we can't even adjust it.

The amount of tabs I had open while planning this trip should have been my first warning sign. Flight prices for different days, hotel options, car rentals, vacation packages - my browser looked like a digital hoarder situation. I decided I'd take care of all the bookings at once. Got our flights for what seemed like a steal - should've known the universe doesn't just hand out travel deals without consequences.

Just double-checked everything today (thank god I did before we left) and realized our flights land at 2pm on the 15th, but our hotel reservation AND airport parking both start on the 16th. So now we're looking at:

  • Nowhere to stay that first night

  • No parking for our car at home

  • A family of 4 with luggage potentially homeless in a tourist city

  • Me facing the judgment of my spouse who specifically asked "are you SURE the dates line up?"

Now I'm frantically searching for a one-night hotel that won't cost a fortune, and trying to figure out if we can add an extra day to our airport parking without taking out a second mortgage.

The worst part? I'm the one who always lectures everyone about "checking and double-checking" travel plans...

TL;DR: Booked family flights a day earlier than hotel reservation, main hotel fully booked that night, now have to scramble for a one-night solution and explain to my family why we're hotel-hopping on vacation.

802
 
 
This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/peculiar-pirate on 2025-05-10 09:50:55+00:00.


Gonna keep some of the details vague for the sake of anonymity. I recently joined a sports club, and I signed up for a competition. This would've been my second time attending the club. A couple of days before the organiser announced that there was a dress theme. Initially he said that the theme was 'best dressed' then he added that he really meant the 'most entertaining' and said there would be prizes for the best outfit. Well I decided to go a bit overkill on this and wear a cosplay outfit that had been sitting in my closet for a while. It has bright colours, a scary mask, and it stands out a lot. As I know no one at the club, I was also thinking it would be a good icebreaker as we could all discuss our costumes together. The day comes around and I hype myself up on the walk there feeling very excited about this event, and some guy even complimented me on my outfit! Only as I approach the building things seem a bit off because I don't see anyone else approaching the building in entertaining outfits/costumes. Oh well, perhaps I'll see them at the meeting point. Lo and behold, when I got there I discovered that I had made a huge misjudgement. No one is wearing any costumes, they are just dressed slightly more formal than usual and one person is wearing a jersey of our rival club. They all look at me rather baffled and slightly concerned. I stuck around for a few minutes hoping that other people will also show up in something entertaining but no one did. I bailed after a few minutes as I could not handle the embarrassment and did a one mile walk of shame back home where two kids cried because they found my costume too scary. I am just going to disappear from that club forever.

Edit: someone in the comments told me to add this for context. The organiser (also the president) who came up with the entertaining theme told me that he was coming in a wedding dress, so I assumed everyone else would be dressing as out there as he was. I also didn't see the same organiser there, so I'm wondering if he bailed too? It's a strange situation.

TL;DR: Misinterpreted the dress theme for an event at my sports club, and wore something extremely wacky which confused everybody there. I decided to go home out of embarrassment, even though the event itself was quite expensive.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Cristalandmoon on 2025-05-10 04:15:43+00:00.


So, I'm the proud owner of a sex toy. His name is Raphael, and it was given to me as a gift a few months ago. I needed to clean it, so I did it with no second thought. Washed it, dried it and store it away in my room as always.

Later today, my mother arrived home, went upstairs to presumably wash her hands, and called me immediately asking loudly: "Is this yours?".

Oh, no. Had I actually imagined I store Raphael away!? My memory does wacky things all the time, so it wasn't impossible. I ran upstair immediately, while my father looked at me puzzled from the kitchen (it's a small house) only to find my mother standing in the bathroom, pointing at the little open cleansing bottle that reads 'CLEANER: liquid soap for sex toys.'

"Oh, yeah, sorry." I chuckled embarrassed. I quickly took the bottle and its cap and ran to hide in my room, as I heard her loudly say: "Disgusting!". A little later she left for the hospital (she's taking care of a relative) without looking at me in the eyes, leaving my puzzled father to repeatedly ask me: "what was that about?", and "why is she so angry?"

I ended up telling him she had found an intimate soap. Nevertheless, it is a good question: why did she look so upset? And then it struck me: the bottle was open. I could've left it like that, but she could have also picked it up. The bottle itself does say it's for sex toys, but the label's design is similar to one for face cleanser, and the soap has a very nice soft smell. Could she have tried to use it on herself!?

But wait, there's more! A few days ago she complained about back pain, so I, as a considerate daughter, bought her a massage gun, which she will recieve tomorrow morning!

Will she be able to look at me in the eyes? Will I be capable of keeping a straight face? We'll see soon enough.

TLDR: I forgot the sex toy cleanser in the bathroom and my mother found it. She might have used it, and tomorrow I'm gifting her a massage gun. Hooray.

804
 
 
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Person8346 on 2025-05-10 00:37:09+00:00.


I just wanna preface that I am infamously faceblind. Just today I saw a women I was convinced was my own sister (it was not).

Anyways I just started a new bartending job in my local town, very kushty. A new waitress started today who I thought was pretty cute. Long blonde hair, seemed very mellow and pleasant. I showed her the ropes, made light small talk, very pleasant overall.

On my break I get to talking to her a bit more and I ask what she's doing for education. She tells me she's in her first year of college, like myself. So I ask 'did you go to (local high school I went to)?' and she responds 'yes we were in the same year, we were in miss cotters maths class together remember?'

Finally it clicks that I've seen this girl around for the last 6 years or so. Back then she had short dark hair with long bangs and we never spoke to eachother, so I wasn't too hard on myself for not recognising her. I apologized and we went back to work.

Later she offered to help me in my bar with just the two of us, had nice conversations and what not. I and all the other bartenders were chatting together as she left and the only said goodbye to me (which I thought was cute).

After she left, I wanted to find a photo of her from back then to compare to now, just for my own amusement. So I look up her insta...

My face when I realised I had slid into her DMs six goddamn months ago and we had chatted a little, and I never recognised her either fucking time.

I didn't just fail to put two and two together, I failed to put THREE AND THREE together. Currently cooking up a casual apology for tomorrows shift.

TL;DR: I didn't recognise new coworker as a girl I went to school with for 6 years, and then didn't realise it was the same girl I texted with a little 6 months ago.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Unlucky-Flower4504 on 2025-05-09 23:15:38+00:00.


I work in a hospital as a phlebotomist, I draw people’s blood and send it to the lab so that they can run tests on it. I had a lady come in, mid twenties and she had a few tests in the system that I didn’t recognize. Nothing special, there’s a billion and a half tests I don’t know the meaning to, my job is to draw the blood, not run the tests on it.

Now my job requires a lot of trying to calm down patients, people hate getting blood drawn so it’s my job to make them feel okay enough to let me poke them. With Mother’s Day coming up this Sunday I have been asking people what their plans are for the weekend, a little lighthearted questions to make the situation a little calmer. I asked this lady what she was planning to do on Mother’s Day this upcoming weekend and she absolutely burst into tears

Turns out she was getting blood drawn for tests following a miscarriage that she had had a few weeks prior, it would have been her first kid and she lost the baby. She also saw my name tag and said my name was the name she was planning to name her kid.

tl:dr, a woman came in to get tests done following a miscarriage, I didn’t know and out of instinct asked her what she was planning to do for Mother’s Day

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/JayCutsby on 2025-05-09 23:07:39+00:00.


My (32M) 3rd period class was super stoked to watch The Maze Runner. I prepped observation worksheets and character development packets to keep them engaged during the movie.

We got through the first 30 minutes, and they were scribbling away at the first page of questions. Then, this one student (15F) pipes up, "I think there's something wrong with this packet."

Before I could even ask what was up, her buddy (17M) snatches the character development packet from her and starts flipping through it.

Turns out, I had somehow managed to copy the ANSWER KEY for Page 1 of the movie observation questions directly into EVERY SINGLE character development packet.

The realization washed over me in a healthy dose of "Oh, you absolute idiot."

But honestly, they were so genuinely thrilled. So, my slightly embarrassed self just shrugged and said, " Enjoy the free answers for the first part. Maybe actually pay attention for the rest of the movie though!"

Part of me feels like I totally failed at the "educational" aspect of movie day, but another part of me is just hoping they'll at least absorb some of the plot. And hey, at least they're happy, right?

TL;DR: Accidentally gave my high school English students the answer key to the first part of their Maze Runner movie worksheet, decided to let them have the win, and am now questioning all my life choices.

807
 
 
This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Objective-Nerve-3505 on 2025-05-09 23:04:03+00:00.


this happened last night (22M)

matched with this girl on hinge (21) and she seemed way out of my league like one of those people who just radiates competence you know?

her profile had this little line that said “ask me about my year in paris” so i did and she told me about how she studied abroad there and spoke fluent french and casually asked if i spoke any too and instead of just saying no like a normal human being i said mais oui because it sounded charming in my head (with the help of good ol google too)

she laughed and that should’ve been the end of it but my dumbass ego decided to double down and convince myself that i could fake it enough to sound cultured or at least mildly impressive

so i spent the next two days cramming french like i was studying for the final exam of a class i forgot i was even taking watched youtube videos listened to pronunciation guides practiced little phrases in the mirror and even downloaded duolingo like it was gonna magically make me fluent overnight

date night comes and she picks this wine bar that’s super cozy and low key candles soft jazz velvet chairs the kind of place where you feel underdressed no matter what you wear

she looked amazing

we start talking and she’s telling me all about paris and how she misses hearing french all the time and i think ok this is the moment this is where i show off my “skills”

so i look her dead in the eye and say je suis très… baguette (i used google translate whatever)

she laughs hard and im thinking i nailed it and im absolutely crushing this date

so then i try to keep the vibe going and say what i thought meant i like red wine which was j’aime le vin rouge de la bibliothèque except yeah apparently that means i like red wine from the library

she just looks at me confused and says wait what

i repeat it and try to act like i meant it and she blinks a few times and says why the library

that’s when i realize i’m in deep i’ve overcommitted and i’ve got nothing left in the tank so i start stringing together any french words i remember from duo lingo which basically amounts to fromage très bien le chien est sur la table

now she’s just staring at me like i’ve glitched and then she suddenly switches into full speed actual french like she’s testing me and i instantly regret everything

i have no clue what she’s saying i catch like two words and just panic smile and start nodding and going oui oui like a complete moron i probably said oui 5 times in a row

then she stops mid sentence and goes in english you don’t speak french do you

i pause try to think of a lie or an excuse or literally anything but all that comes out is not even a little bit and then just starts laughing like full on laughing and i’m sitting there feeling like an idiot while im redder than a tomato by the second.

she ends up paying for the wine which made it even worse somehow like i felt like a little kid who just got babysat by someone way cooler. i probably shouldnt worry about that part too much but it just adds salt to the wound since i enjoy providing

as we’re leaving she says text me when you learn a sentence that doesn’t involve libraries

i texted her letting her know im on duolingo. most embarrassing date ever and its my fault

so yeah tifu by trying to impress someone with a language i absolutely do not speak and got roasted into oblivion in a velvet wine bar

Tl;Dr Tried to impress a Hinge date by pretending I spoke French. Blurted out nonsense phrases like "I like red wine from the library," she called my bluff by speaking real French, I panicked and said "oui" 5 times. She laughed, paid the bill, and told me to text her when I could form a sentence that made sense

edit: not sure how to add a flair after i made the post sorry mods :(

808
 
 
This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Just_OneReason on 2025-05-09 20:01:38+00:00.


So a few weeks back I went away for the weekend. When I came back home I went to take a shower and I noticed a thick black strand of hair in the shower. I live with my boyfriend. It was too long to be his, and too dark and thick to be mine. He showers twice a day, so it didn’t seem likely a hair from my head had stayed in the shower like that for days. Still, I know he never rinses the shower before/after.

It had the same curl pattern as my hair and was about the right length, but I had never seen a hair from my head look like that. My hair is very fine. I even pulled out some strands of my hair to compare, and this hair was way thicker and darker. My first thought was his sister who has dark wavy hair used our shower, as she’d been over, but she didn’t. Obviously I considered he was cheating and brought some dark haired beauty into our shower. I made the immediate decision to trust my boyfriend, and not confront him, as that hair could’ve ended up in the shower for a number of reasons. Even still I took the hair and set it aside. For the first few days after, I scoured that shower and our bed looking for any signs of someone else. Eventually I mostly forgot about it but I thought about it from time to time and was even self congratulatory for being such a trusting girlfriend and never questioning him.

Today I was in the shower again and noticed a particularly thick strand of hair on my head. I pulled it out, and it was a dark, thick strand of hair that exactly matched the other one. It was from my own damn head the whole time. I am SO thankful I never confronted my boyfriend and trusted him completely. I just thought it was weird, and turns out I’m a dummy.

TL;DR I found a strange hair in hair in the shower after being out of town, and wondered if I’d been cheated on. It was my own hair.

809
 
 
This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/fieryone4 on 2025-05-09 12:47:20+00:00.


Last night, I was too tired to do one simple task: put out a new stick of butter to soften for the morning. No big deal, right?

WRONG.

Around 2 a.m., my teenage son, blessed with the metabolism of a hummingbird on espresso, decided he needed waffles. He fires up the toaster, goes hunting for butter… and finds a suspiciously wrapped stick in the fridge. Foil-wrapped. Rectangular. Solid. His brain, running on fumes and gamer energy, goes: “Butter.”

Spoiler: It was vegetable shortening. Just pure, flavorless, ghost-white grease. But did he hesitate? Nope. He slathered it all over those waffles, poured syrup on top like nothing was amiss, and ate every bite. The man had shortening and syrup on his waffles like it was totally normal.

This morning he casually tells me, “The butter was kinda flavorless last night, but the syrup covered it.”

I just stood there, horrified, while he walked away like some culinary war criminal.

TIFU. And I may have raised a gremlin.

TL;DR: Forgot to put out butter. Teen son made 2am waffles, mistook foil-wrapped vegetable shortening for butter, ate it with syrup, didn’t notice. Thinks “bland butter” is a thing now.

810
 
 
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Frenkbosi24 on 2025-05-08 22:32:13+00:00.


This happened a couple days ago and I’m still cringing thinking about it

I had a Zoom interview for a remote position. It was full-time, had benefits, seemed like a solid opportunity, so I actually took the time to prepare. Had my notes, practiced my answers, even changed into a decent shirt (pajama pants still made the cut though)

So I’m sitting there waiting for the host to join and I’ve got my AirPods in like always. Didn’t even think twice. Zoom said “waiting for host” so I figured I had a minute to just relax

And for some reason I started talking to myself out loud. Not loud, just kind of mumbling pep talk stuff like, “Okay, just be normal. You got this. Don’t ramble. Smile. Pretend like you have it together.”

Then I muttered “You’re not a mess. You just look like one right now.”

And that’s when I heard it:

“Hey! We can hear you by the way. No rush though.”

Turns out the interviewer had joined silently and Zoom defaulted to my AirPods mic, so I had been broadcasting my little self-deprecating pep talk straight into the meeting

I froze. Couldn’t even think of a recovery. Just awkwardly laughed, turned on my camera, and tried to power through like nothing happened

Interview went okay (I think) but now the HR guy definitely knows I’m running mostly on vibes and caffeine

TL;DR Forgot my AirPods had a mic during a Zoom interview and accidentally gave the recruiter a live feed of my pre-interview meltdown

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Suspicious_Remote_70 on 2025-05-08 21:26:51+00:00.


So this happened earlier this week, and I'm still getting crap from my coworkers for it, but here we go.

I work in a medium-sized office where things are generally chill, but we’ve got this unspoken vibe of “don’t rock the boat.” One of my coworkers, let’s call him Jake, has a habit of loudly talking over people in meetings. Like, blatantly steamrolling quieter folks and taking credit for ideas. It’s been happening for a while, but I always figured it wasn’t my place to step in.

Well, this time during a team call, he completely shut down another colleague (who’s new and was clearly nervous) and repeated her idea a few minutes later like it was his own. Everyone just awkwardly moved on. I don’t know what came over me, but I just calmly said, “I think that was actually new coworker’s idea a minute ago, right?” And tried to just keep the convo going.

Jake went stone cold. The whole room went quiet. New coworker looked kind of shocked but gave me a little smile.

Fast forward: Jake hasn’t spoken to me since, and another coworker pulled me aside and said, “You really embarrassed him.” I didn’t mean to start drama, I just couldn’t sit there and let it slide anymore. Now I’m the “office narc” or something.

Anyway, I guess my FU was trying to stand up for someone and accidentally putting a target on my back. Maybe should’ve handled it more tactfully? Idk.

TL;DR: Tried to call out a pattern of credit-stealing in a meeting in the most chill way possible, ended up making things awkward and mildly nuking office politics.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/schrauba on 2025-05-08 17:48:00+00:00.


I (43m) work as a live sound engineer. On this particular day 8 years ago my job was handing out microphones at the side of the stage. The ones we used that day were tiny mics attached to a metal tie clip and a little black radio transmitter the size of a pack of cigarettes to put in your pocket, connected wit a thin 2 foot cable. 

My job included, but wasn't limited to: clipping microphones to the guest's lapel, assist with any questions or wishes and advise my audio colleague on the sound board "clip 6 going on stage, clip 4 goes off, clip 7 is on Mr. Xxx now", so he could turn them on and off accordingly. 

This particular event was very important. I do not remember what exactly the occasion was, maybe Hamburg was chosen to host a sport event or a prestigious building was completed or it might have been an award show. Important enough to have high ranking politicians and celebrities there. 

Everything started well, but just after the introduction speech I get a radio call "Hey, the mayor is late. He will be here right before his speech". Ok, I have had this happen before, no worries. I am prepared and I know I can clip that mic on him in seconds. So I tell them "Check, please make sure he comes to me first, so I can mic him up". 

The show goes on and then there is a small commotion and through the main gate of the hall our mayor and hisstaff walk in. But they walk straight to their reserved seats in the front row, flanked by the security guards who look like two Agent Smiths from the Matrix. Our stage has stairs in the front, and speakers walk up straight from the audience. That means I now have no way to clip a mic on him before he walks on stage and he is up next. My adrenaline spikes. Fuck! So I decide if he doesn't come to me, I will have to go to him. I grab his mic and dart out from my little hide out at the side of the stage, I see the mayor and quickly walk towards him. 

Now let's switch to Agent Smith's perspective. As I said, these guys were straight out of a movie, bullet proof vests under the black suits, earpieces, sunglasses, armed, tactical dress shoes,  gloves etc. They had just brought in their vip and suddenly a big dude in all black runs towards him. Even worse, holding a suspicious black box with blinking LEDs in one hand and a chord with a button at the end in the other hand. Oh no, a bomb!

Back to me. I am about 3 feet away from the mayor and I see both agents going code red. They turn towards me, hands on their guns, yelling "Stop!". I freeze and only now understand my predicament. I quickly try to defuse the situation by explaining to them what I am doing. To say that relaxed them would be an overstatement, but they didn't want to kill me any more, which was good enough for me. I can finally fix the mic and when I get back to my hide out I have a little mental break down. Mind you, all this during a speech in front of thousands of important people including my boss and the press. And then my radio goes "Easy there Lee-Harvey Oswald". 

The rest of the day went well, my crew made fun of me for weeks and that mayor later became chancellor of Germany.

Edit: typos, grammar

TL:DR I ran towards our city's mayor and his security detail almost shot me

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/_edgerunner on 2025-05-08 14:10:32+00:00.


Ok, so not today but a little over a week ago my Son, Wife, and I were playing a game. On the weekends when we order coffee we usually take the stickers off the tops (from them being delivered) and chase each other around the house, trying to sticker each other on the back. It’s fun, it’s cute, and a semi-tradition at this point.

My wife had me cornered in the living room, sticker on hand, ready for the strike. Her grin showed she didn’t think I could escape my fate. In a panic, fearing the humiliation of a sticker being stuck on me, I saw my only chance to get away and I took it.

I jumped over the couch.

At about the peak of the jump I felt my right foot clip the top of the cushions. I fell like a bag of wet cement. Although I did *technically clear the couch, I still hit the ground hard and felt my kneecap slip and slide around and an electric shock of pain through my leg.

As I yelled out in pain, a crumpled mess on the floor. my Wife, my love, my joy, casually walked up to me, put the sticker on my back then asked if I needed a ride to ER.

I did lol.

And that is how I tore my ACL playing a silly game and taking it a little too far.

Silver lining, my son stopped jumping and climbing all over the couch.

The offending sticker is now on my crutches as a lil memento, a reminder to check myself prior to wrecking myself.

TL;DR I tore my ACL jumping over a couch while playing with my family.

814
 
 
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Povilys on 2025-05-07 23:57:24+00:00.


I’ve decided to share because I honestly think this story could save someone’s life.

I had heard about phenibut online as a “relaxing supplement,” good for anxiety, social confidence, and even enhancing your mood. With zero prior experience and no real understanding of how powerful and slow-acting it is, I made a life-threatening mistake.

I started cautiously enough, taking about 750mg (¼ teaspoon). Two hours later, feeling nothing, I naively thought, “Hey, maybe it’s weak.” So I took another full teaspoon. Another hour passed—still no effects. So I took another teaspoon. By the end of the evening, I’d taken roughly 15 grams.

To give some context: 6 grams of phenibut is considered potentially lethal. Taking 15 grams was unimaginably reckless.

The Nightmare Begins:

I don’t even remember falling asleep. The next morning, I woke up confused, disoriented, with stuff scattered around my room. I realized with horror I had been in a complete dissociative blackout—moving around and interacting with things, yet completely unconscious mentally.

Then came the true horror: • Extreme panic attacks lasting continuously for days, feeling like permanent brain damage had occurred. • Severe depression that was crushing and felt completely hopeless. • Parosmia: Every smell became a repulsive chemical stench, making eating impossible. • Constant skin tingling, feeling like electric currents running through me. • Visual distortions, subtle but disturbing, like shadows and patterns shifting slightly around me.

I barely slept more than four hours each night, and falling asleep was incredibly difficult. Yet, when I did sleep, I had hyperrealistic, vivid dreams—movie-like scenarios with full plots, dialogues, and incredibly detailed visuals. It felt as if I was living through elaborate, unsettling films every night.

The Hospital Visit and Doctor’s Reaction:

On day three, terrified that I’d permanently destroyed my mind, I went to the hospital for help. When I told the doctor I had taken 15 grams of phenibut, he straight-up didn’t believe me:

“That’s impossible,” he said. “You would be in a coma or dead.”

No treatment, no tests—just disbelief. I left feeling more alone and scared than ever.

Later that day, I started feeling intensely cold internally, an odd chill that I couldn’t shake. After some research, I found out this could actually be a sign my GABA receptors were finally healing—a weird moment of relief amidst absolute horror.

Miraculous Recovery:

Amazingly, by day four, I began returning to normal. My symptoms vanished. Physically and mentally, I was somehow okay. To this day, I don’t understand how I survived without permanent damage or death.

Why I’m Sharing This:

I was incredibly lucky. Most people don’t recover from such extreme doses without serious consequences. Phenibut is dangerously potent and easily misunderstood due to its slow onset and high overdose potential.

If you’re ever tempted to try phenibut or something similar: • Start extremely low (250mg or less). • Wait several hours before redosing (it can take 3–5 hours to fully hit). • Always use precise measurements—never eyeball doses.

I truly hope this story might prevent even one person from experiencing the horror I endured.

Please, stay safe.

TL;DR: Took an insane 15-gram phenibut overdose by accident. Experienced blackouts, psychosis-like panic, sensory hell, and disbelief from doctors who said I should’ve died. Miraculously survived with no lasting harm, but learned a brutal lesson about drug safety.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Cesarchinchilla_ on 2025-05-07 22:18:06+00:00.


I've been on a baking kick lately after watching way too many food shows (dangerous hobby, I know). Since I had a payraise past month, I decided to splurge on some fancy chocolate and other high-quality ingredients to make what I thought would be the world's most impressive brownies.

The recipe called for this special dark chocolate that has this really intense, almost bitter taste that I personally love. I spent HOURS making these things perfect - fudgy center, crackly top, the whole deal.

I brought them to work, put them in the break room with a little "Help yourself!" note, and went about my day feeling like a domestic god.

About an hour later, I started noticing people whispering and looking in my direction. Then my manager pulled me into a conference room looking SUPER concerned.

Turns out, everyone thought I had brought in "special" brownies because:

  1. They tasted "weird and intense" (just the fancy chocolate!)
  2. One guy claimed he felt "different" after eating three (probably just a sugar rush)
  3. I had recently mentioned being stressed and needing a vacation

HR got involved. They were talking about drug testing. Someone almost called the police.

I had to explain in excruciating detail about my fancy chocolate purchase and even pulled up the receipt on my banking app to prove I just bought regular baking ingredients.

The worst part? They threw away the rest of my brownies that cost me like $80 to make.

TL;DR: Spent money on fancy chocolate, made gourmet brownies, accidentally convinced my workplace I was distributing drugs.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/KillerQueeh_Slash on 2025-05-07 20:26:43+00:00.


So, I had the brilliant idea of giving myself a Brazilian Wax.

I took my wax warmer and put some wax in it, got to the temperature that it needed to melt then took a shower.

This is when my supposed brilliance took place. Which is fuck up number 1.

I took a look downwards with a mirror, then slapped a bit of wax, but then I realized I fucked up…. It was really, really painful to take off.

I was literally sweating after I took a shower, I struggled to get a piece of wax off and prayed that I don’t injure myself while ripping it off. Luckily the sweat helped!

And yes, I was cursing at myself for doing this.

After some minutes of trying to get the remaining wax off, I went to get a scissors in the bathroom to cut it off.

What did I learn?

Buy hard wax if I wanted to do a Brazilian or find a place that does a Brazilian wax.

TLDR: Don’t do a Brazilian at home. Go to a professional waxer.

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This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/mrgrassydassy on 2025-05-07 20:07:32+00:00.


So, I decided to take on this big project at work to impress my boss. I thought I could handle it because, you know, I’ve done similar tasks before, just on a smaller scale. Well, I was wrong. I ended up taking on way more than I could chew. I didn’t properly plan, skipped some important steps, and honestly had no idea how to manage the team to get things done on time. Long story short, the project was a mess, and now I’m scrambling to fix my mistakes while trying to salvage my reputation at work. The worst part is that my boss has started questioning my judgment. I feel like I’ve set myself back a few steps, and now I’m wondering if I should’ve just stuck to my usual routine.

Has anyone else made a huge mistake like this at work? How did you recover from it? What would you have done differently?

TL;DR: Tried to impress my boss by taking on a big project, ended up messing it up and now I’m scrambling to fix it.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Aggressive_Trade2016 on 2025-05-07 10:20:15+00:00.


This is one of the most embarrassing things I’ve done and whenever I think about the look on the guys face when he knows I’m lying makes me physically CRINGE.

I live in England and we have a supermarket called Morrisons. Sometimes in Morrisons they have little charity booths where they have a little stand and 1 or 2 people standing there handing out leaflets and if they catch you, they’ll try and talk you into paying money to their charity.

I am one of those dummies that can’t say no.

I checked out, was walking out of the store. EVERYONE BEFORE ME WAS JUST IGNORING THIS GUY AND WALKING OUT THE DOORS. He was standing there in yellow uniform with a yellow stand for their charity about dogs.

They had a board with about 20 different pictures of dogs which were super cute. He said to me “ah you look like the kind of person that loves dogs” I SHOULD HAVE JUST SMILED AND KEPT WALKING!!! But I stopped and said yes. He asked if I could spare 2 minutes to hear about the work they do. I SHOULD HAVE SAID THAT I’M IN A RUSH. I said of course and he asked if I’m interested in adopting a dog and paying however much a month and instead of saying “sorry no, not today” I said “oh I adopted one for my son the other night, when we were looking on the website” WHYYYYYY DID I LIE?!?!

He asked me which one, I pointed at the German Shepard. Then the mother trucker pulled out his iPad as he said “Awe Benny has only just gone live on the website, I didn’t realise he had any adopters yet!”

He pulled up the dog’s bloody profile and said “oh… it doesn’t look like anyone is sponsoring Benny”.

It was the most awkward and embarrassing thing ever. I could have just walked off. I could have just stood there and cried. But no. I adopted TWO dogs then and there and still pay god knows much monthly.

This was 2 years ago and that is a confession about one of my most embarrassing moments that I still (literally) pay for to this day.

TL;DR - I lied that I already sponsor a dog, he could see that I didn’t. Out of complete and utter shame and embarrassment, I now pay monthly to sponsor 2 dogs… 2 years later.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/DanielaThePialinist on 2025-05-07 05:30:14+00:00.


My kitchen floor needed a good old cleaning. I've been putting it off because I didn't know how to go about cleaning it. This past weekend I finally got around to doing it, so I Googled how to clean a kitchen floor, and Google told me I could use vinegar and baking soda to clean it. I thought, cool, I just bought both of those things last week when I did some restock shopping. I poured vinegar all over my kitchen floor, then poured baking soda over the vinegar. The baking soda reacted with the vinegar and made a foamy solution, as baking soda tends to do with vinegar because, well, chemistry. The more you know. Anyway, I let it sit for a few minutes while it soaks up the grease I'm trying to clean out. I start to mop the solution off, when suddenly the baking soda appears to have stuck to the floor, and although the solution did do a good job of cleaning off kitchen grease and whatnot from the floor, I'm now left with a huge mess of baking soda. I tried mopping it with water, and it appeared to look less baking soda-y, but... when the water dried up, I saw that the baking soda was in fact still there. I've now been going at it for a few days now, using diluted soap from my spray bottle, and that appears to be getting the job done. It's not perfect yet, but it's working better than the pure water, so let's hope I get this thing clean in the next few days or so.

TL;DR: I tried cleaning my kitchen floor and it just created a mess of baking soda that is impossible to clean.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Thatoneguywhoforgets on 2025-05-07 01:08:59+00:00.


TIFU Because I (M22) tried to get my Mexican passport to leave the country and work in the U.S, before any confusion I am dual citizen but I lived my whole life in Mexico and my parents aren't us residents or citizens, but unfortunately, my neglectful self failed to pay off a loan I took out, aproxmally 2 grand in usd, I used to pay in time and orderly fashion. Now I’ve been sued and can’t leave the country to find a job in America to pay my debts. I messed up so bad that I want to cry, but I can’t. I feel like a dumbass for taking out that loan. Everything was going well until I lost my job as a wedding waiter and started having medical expenses I need to keep in check. A whole bunch of stuff happened, and I just want to vent—this is honestly a cry for help. TL;DR: I fuck up my only avenue to better my financial situation

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/mrs-monroe on 2025-05-06 21:04:18+00:00.


This is from a while back, but it definitely fits here. Back in 2023, my husband and I suddenly adopted a senior dog named Charlie. We aren’t really for basic names like that, so we always said his name like Danny Devito did, “CHAHWLY.” It stuck so hard that we ended up renaming him to Cholly. Cholly was an amazing dog.

We always corrupt our dogs’ names into silly nicknames, and one or two kinda end up unofficially replacing their real name. From Rocky to Bubby, Penny to Peepers, Rosie to Posie, etc.

While playing around with Cholly’s name, I stumbled on Chollywog, like pollywog (another name for tadpoles). And of course, while playing around with that, I… shortened it.

“Come here, Wog! Who’s my little Woggy man??” and boy howdy he loved it. It fit him so well… he was just Woggy! I think my logic was that it sounded like “wonky” or “soggy,” which he definitely was. This went on for too long, until I casually mentioned it at Sunday dinner with my family, when my brother gives me a weird look and informs me that it’s a slur for Indian people. I was crushed. Thankfully I never put this name into writing aside from messaging my husband.

I feel awful, but the name fit so perfectly in my ignorant little world! Perhaps I’m awful, but I still refer to him as that name when talking about him to my husband. We only had him for a year, but he was the specialest dog I’ve ever had. I miss my Cholly ❤️😭

TL;DR I lovingly named my dog a slur

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/throwawaylykconfetti on 2025-05-06 20:27:19+00:00.


We were attending a wedding reception today, of my husband's cousin and his bride. My husband and cousin were very close growing up, almost like siblings. It was a lovely event held in the groom's brother's large garden.

I had to step back inside to the kitchen for a bit to make a bottle for my baby, and in there sat what is probably best described as a group of "Asian aunties". Anyone who is Asian or related to such aunties will know very well how judgemental and filterless this brutal demographic can be, even the sweetest ones. This group included the groom's mother and aunts. I was trying my best to mind my own business but overheard them discussing how plain the bride is.

At first I was really disheartened to hear these judgemental and superficial comments, about a new family member as well! And the newlyweds obviously are very much in love and happy together. I wouldn't even call her plain, though I suppose the aunties were just proud of their son/nephew being handsome in comparison.

Then I let my mind wander beyond that. I realized a trend/pattern among most of the members of my husband's family. They are all quite good looking in conventional terms, blessed with some good genetic lottery. But most if not all of them (thinking of my husband, his siblings and their cousins and it's quite a big family) have married or are dating people who are less attractive by appearance.

I thought this was super wholesome because it shows that (except for the elderly gossiping aunties) despite being good looking themselves, they are not superficial people and choose their partners based on personality and love them for who they are regardless of their appearance. It gave me a warm fuzzy "how sweet" feeling.

And then realization hit and I had definitely FU by thinking this far. I realized that I, too, have married into this family. Of good looking people who marry less attractive ones.

I am the plain, unattractive partner.

I took the now ready bottle of milk and went back to the garden party, defeated, humbled and newly self aware of where I stand on the attractiveness scale.

TL;DR: TIFU by realising my husband's family is wholesome people who are conventionally attractive but not superficial and therefore have partners who are less conventionally attractive - and that I'm in that second group of people and therefore must be not very attractive. :(

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/bubblegum_babydoll on 2025-05-06 05:14:24+00:00.


So technically speaking, it isn't my car, it's my friends. (Yeah yeah common excuse, I know.) This particular car belongs to my best friend, but she was storing it at my house because she doesn't have room at her current place. She bought it last summer.

At some point, she let me use it to drive three blocks to work and back. I thought it would be no big deal, but I was very wrong. She never bothered registering the car and I'm not sure why tbh, but she procrastinates a lot. A couple weeks ago, she asked if I'd like to have the car. I say awesome, I'd love it, and we made plans to go to the DMV soon to transfer ownership.

Now I know fuck-all about cars and that includes the license plates. I knew the car wasn't registered and the tags were expired, but I grew up in the boondocks where nobody gave a shit. I genuinely thought driving three blocks was totally fine. I had good intentions, but the only cop in the entire town followed me to my driveway to give me a ticket. I now have to pay a ticket plus tag and registration fees.

Welp.... lesson learned I guess. Don't procrastinate kids, and don't deny the government their money. They'll come for ya.

TL;DR: Borrowed a car, drove unregistered and paid for it with embarrassment and a ticket.

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This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/-Doctor_Dread- on 2025-05-06 16:59:39+00:00.


I’m currently on vacation in a sunny beachy place, so I was walking on the beach for a while with my feet in the ocean. Felt really nice. I said bye to the friend I was with because I was going back to our beach chairs to collect my stuff and head back to the hotel room.

I grabbed my things in my beach bag which included a book, sunglasses, my room key, a bottle of water and my phone. I then put on my sandals (which were incredibly uncomfortable to wear with sticky sandy feet) and walked towards the foot washing station nearby.

The foot washing station is obviously for getting sand off feet, which I was planning to do. I get there and realize there are quite a few buttons, so I pressed the one nearest to the ground, thinking it would soak my feet.

Well, a second later and my entire body was soaked including my book, phone, room key and sunglasses. I pressed the button for the shower head, not the foot wash. And tons of people saw this, by the way. Lots of laughter and chuckles.

Of course this was the one time I decided to wear clothes instead of a bathing suit so those got soaked, and now my room key is broken and the book (which was newly bought) is soaked too. Despite all this I can’t help but laugh.

I had to trudge up to the hotel lobby soaking wet to ask for a new room key which was quite a far walk to take while drenched.

Maybe not the extreme fuck up people hope for on this subreddit, but a silly one.

TLDR; pressed a button that soaked my entire body instead of just my feet and soaked all my belongings

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/titanificator on 2025-05-06 16:46:47+00:00.


Been at the company for 2+ years with access to web apps. My initial training was a disaster due to busy/unhelpful colleagues.

Today, a new team member got access to all apps, including two I'd never seen. One worked, the other gave an error. Turns out I was supposed to have access all along! Found an old email with an expired setup link from when I started 🤦‍♀️.

Told my new manager about the error (omitting that I'd never used it). He's now sorting it with access management and platform support, who are confused about the lack of access.

Terrified my manager will ask why I haven't been using this platform I just discovered 😭.

TL;DR: Bad initial training led to me missing access to two web apps for 2+ years. Just found out, one doesn't work, and I'm dreading explaining to my new manager why I've never used it.

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