Today I Fucked Up

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/GrundalWizzard on 2025-06-11 13:21:30+00:00.

My partner and I went to dinner last night and when we got back I opened up the garage and said hi to my neighbors. The garage was significantly hotter than outside so I decided to leave it open for a while, fast forward 30 minutes later I had just chugged a sprite and wanted to go smoke before we watched a movie. So I head to the garage and when I open the door I feel this visceral burp coming on so I tilted my head back, fists clenched, arms by my side, tilted my head back and roars like a lion. Well when I opened my eyes my neighbors entire family was in their driveway frozen. I had left the garage open and forgot. I didn't no what else to do so I just closed the garage and went back inside. Please help I dont want to leave my house anymore. TL;DR: I forgot I left the garage open and when i went outside I burped louder than I ever have before directly at my neighbors family and then went back inside.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/JDcmh on 2025-06-11 09:34:24+00:00.

The actual FU was done a few weeks ago, and I just realized it this morning. At 4:30 am.

After years of using the same alarm sound (a compilation of Alexis saying "David" and "Eww, David" and the like from the show Schitt's Creek) I decided I wanted to wake up to something more positive sounding.

So I reviewed the mostly mechanical, synthesized sounds that came with my Samsung phone and selected one called "Bird Song." It starts softly and crescendos, and was a pleasant way to gently wake up for several days - definitely better than hearing my name repeated over and over with slight disdain. I've enjoyed this and have quickly acclimated myself to this new sound.

Now you need to know that it was cold the last couple of weeks, and so the window in the bedroom was closed. It's an old house but the windows are pretty solid, which prevents a lot of outside noise disturbing my sleep.

This week it's been warmer - enough so that opening the window makes for a comfortable "getting to sleep" environment. And it's quiet enough that falling asleep is easy.

But I've also woken up a bit early the last few days, I'm tired during the day, and even more tired at night, and the cycle has repeated like this for several days. I have been completely confused as to why I suddenly can’t seem to sleep later than 4:30am, and this morning I realized why.

The birds outside start chirping sometime close to 4am and have woken me up every day this week, 2.5 hours before my alarm... which I will now be changing to something mechanical and synthesized.

TL;DR: I set my alarm sound to emulate Bird Song and now I've been awoken every day way too early by ACTUAL Bird Song.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/FloydBeatlesEagles on 2025-06-11 04:23:03+00:00.

So this just happened and I’m still processing the social trauma.

I was waiting for the elevator in my apartment building when a very cute girl I hadn’t seen before came up and stood beside me. We exchanged a friendly smile. Nothing too much, just that nice little “hi I’m not a serial killer” energy you give strangers in shared spaces.

Elevator doors open, we both get in. I press my floor — 17th. I ask, “Which floor?” She says, “21, thanks!” Cool. I hit 21 for her. We make some small talk. I mention the weather, she smiles, we vibe. Light, easy elevator banter.

Then the doors open on 17.

Without thinking, I step aside, gesture toward the open door like a true gentleman and say, “After you.”

She pauses, gives me a mildly confused look, and goes, “…I’m on 21?”

Cue the instant internal facepalm. I just tried to let this girl off at my stop like I was the elevator concierge of Floor 17.

We share one second of high-density awkwardness. I smile like an idiot, nod like I meant to do that, and walk out.

I am now considering new apartments. Preferably ones without elevators. Or attractive women. Or eye contact.

TL;DR: Met a cute girl in the elevator, tried to be smooth, ended up escorting her to the wrong floor like a socially anxious butler. Regret is eternal.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Geoduckwhisperer on 2025-06-11 00:30:03+00:00.

TIFU by using the women's restroom...

So I get down to my boat and start prepping it for my crew and our work day. After I'm finished prepping, nature called, sent it to voicemail... well, she called again...

So I'm scrambling to the restroom from my boat. One of my crew had shown up and was heading for the men's room to give it a, "new scent".

I said F It, I'm using the women's. Not uncommon for this to be a thing. The marina gets a lot of traffic from us dive boats, and there's only 2, single person, restrooms.

I finish, wash up and clean up after myself, and go to unlock the deadbolt... it wasn't turning... so I jiggle the door and continue to apply pressure on the lock. Nothing....

Ok... So... I decide to use both hands...

SNAP! Handle for the lock rotates, but I don't hear the deadbolt slide...

I look into the crack of the door, and there is the stubborn deadbolt nestled in it's little room, done with life.

My crewman comes out, im pounding on the door hollering for him.

He starts laughing... and hard....

Then my tender and one of my other divers show up... normally, at this point, my boat is parked at the loading dock... they start calling me wondering if the day is canceled... nope... locked in the women's bathroom... I can hear them laughing from across the parking lot.

They go and get some people that work at the marina, but theres nothing they can really do... there's no lock on the outside, just a vacant/occupied indicator.

Then I remember... I have a credit card tool in my wallet!!! I've had it in there for over 10 years and never needed it until today.

I remove the 2 screws from the face plate, 2 screws from the body/housing, and VIOLA! Day light.

I take a huge breath of fresh air, and then the sawsall comes in and cuts the guts out to the dead bolt. They passed me a screw driver, and I got the deadbolt out!!! Im finally free, and the laughter and ribbing is still going on.

Happy Tuesday, everyone!!

TLDR: Used the women's bathroom because the men's was occupied. The lock snapped, and I was able to use a tool in kept in my wallet to get out.

Edit: corrected most typos and punctuation. Posted from phone and I have fat fingers.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Moonjinx4 on 2025-06-11 00:27:54+00:00.

I was in an adventurous mood and was exploring recipes for dinner. I came across a teriyaki meatball dish that I had eyeballed before, but I didn't have all the ingredients before. I looked it over and realized with excitement, hey! I have a full pineapple in my fridge that I didn't know what to do with, and this was a great way to use it up!

I read through the directions, and one step required me to use pineapple juice reserved from the can. Hmm, since I'm using a fresh pineapple, I can't do that. But I can just blend up a portion of the pineapple and use that instead, right?

So I did. The smells emanating from the oven were promising. I eagerly served my children two meatballs each and sat down to eat and...

Good lord, what is this? This isn't meat, it's paste. I mean the taste is fine, but oh...oh! It's sticking to the roof of my mouth. No honey, you don't have to eat this, put it in the trash. Yes you can make popcorn. We got leftovers in the fridge right? Let's do that instead.

And yes, somebody did give me a pineapple that I accepted cause it was free and I like pineapple.

TL:DR: the fresh pineapple changed the texture of the meal to something that was very unpleasant.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/CoffeeManWilson on 2025-06-10 22:40:51+00:00.

I was trying to make butternut squash soup for dinner. All was going well, the soup was smelling and tasting amazing… until the last step. I had to blend the soup until smooth but the recipe I was following didn’t say anything about letting it cool before blending. I put a few scoops in my blender and let it blend until smooth. I went to remove the cap from blender and before I knew it, there was boiling hot soup all over my hands, arms and torso. It felt someone threw a fireball at me and my kitchen looked as if Garfield had exploded in my kitchen from eating too much lasagna. Apparently steam and blenders don’t mix and I had to learn that the hard way.

TL;DR I put boiling hot butternut squash soup in a blender. It exploded, burned the hell out of me and made my kitchen looked like a Garfield murder scene.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/jleahul on 2025-06-10 16:28:08+00:00.

A couple of years ago, my oldest daughter (7yo at the time) stubbed her toe badly. She doesn't have a bad or disobedient bone in her body, the sweetest kid you'll ever meet.

As she was grimacing in pain, I told her that shouting a bad word after stubbing your toe was scientifically proven to make it hurt less. She was reluctant to do it in case she got in trouble, but I let her know it was okay and she wouldn't get in trouble for it, say the worst word you know.

Eventually she gritted her teeth and said "God DAMMIT!" and we both laughed.

Little did I know her little sister (5yo at the time), the infamous 'rebellious 2nd born', was listening in.

Flash forward to last night. Daughter #2 (7 now) is getting ready for bed, and all I hear is "FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK". I look at her incredulously, and she says "I stubbed my toe, so its okay to say 'fuck'."

I'm like, "I did say that, didn't I?"

After some consideration I let her know "The "bad word when you stub your toe" is only a house rule, don't do that at school or over at your friend's house, okay? And maybe don't use the F-word next time..."

"Okay!"

Just glad that mom didn't overhear it!

TL;DR: I encouraged my sweet first-born to say a bad word after stubbing her toe, and she said a mild one. Two years later my spirited second-born stubbed her toe and dropped numerous F-Bombs because she thought it was okay.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/poop_blocker404 on 2025-06-10 15:14:22+00:00.

I have few meeting scheduled today and one of the meeting was later changed to zoom meeting.

My colleague was supposed to do a bit of presentation. Halfway thru, his computer keeps lagging and exited the sharing screen on its own a couple of times. Our boss seems impatient and expressed his agitation. So, I decided to help my colleague and lend him my laptop (I was already in the zoom call but i was in another room)

Instead of double checking his slides on my laptop first, he went straight to the browser.

He opens up my browser, and cotton panties ads shouting on the screen. I was so embarrassed and he got embarrased. Yes, I was looking at lingerie last night before I went to bed. Luckily it was on not on the other tab. It was black lacy lingerie with tiny little bow I’m getting myself for my birthday. 🫣

Now, no one has reported me to HR regarding this. I don’t know if I’m in trouble.

Tldr: Please make sure double check yourself before being kind to other people.

Ps: There was also few tabs on the browser of job applications.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/lil_tink_tink on 2025-06-10 12:45:08+00:00.

I wanted a sweet treat before bed so I grabbed the Welch's gummies snacks I bought as a healthier alternative to candy. As I'm snacking on them I'm sharing them with my boyfriend who is in a discord call with his brother. The gummies are super chewy and sticking to my teeth hard. As I'm snacking my tooth that U had a root canal on two years ago feels weird. Loose even. I'm sure I'm just imagining it. So I keep snacking away. The feeling is weird so I test the gummy on that side again. I was right, the crown was loose and pops off.

I panic but luckily spit it out with the gummies so I don't accidentally swallow it. This is just my luck. Guess I'll call the dentist in the morning and get it fixed. There is gummies gunk all over it so I take it to the sink to clean it off.

As I'm washing it my hands slip and it falls down the sink. I start screaming and laughing at how ridiculous this whole situation is and my boyfriend is cracking up and shaking his head.

After a little bit of fishing I pull it out.

Now I have about a $200-$1000 dental bill to deal with. 😩

TL;DR I almost lost part of my tooth to the garbage disposal.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Adept-Play5580 on 2025-06-10 04:53:33+00:00.

For context I am still a teenager and not a full grown responsible adult

So This started when my parents had to go for some work at 6pm and as usual I wasnt gonna accompany them so I was left home alone , their work got done and they decided to hit up my uncle who lived down 4 miles ahead.

Inspite of knowing this my dumb self thought to take support of a pillow on my head and lay in a sleeping position while watching a football game.

Eventually the game got boring and I started to fall asleep , (my parents usually dont take keys with them as i am responsible) I FELL ASLEEP fast forward i wake to the door getting knocked aggressively or should i say very aggressively i check my phone and theres 39 missed calls by my parents , and when i open the door there's my pissed mom who calls my dad because he couldnt keep up and had to go get in the car.

Now it turns out I am not going to be home alone from now and also the cause of a broken doorbell.

TL;DR: - Op fell asleep while parents werent home for 2 hours which resulted in pissed parents and a broken doorbell

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/DiscombobulatedTop39 on 2025-06-09 23:00:50+00:00.

May 14th I got a speeding ticket in my work car for going 82 in a 55 (oops, yeah it was dumb.) I lost the ticket because I lose everything that's not attached to my hip. I've been trying since then to send to contact the court and get a copy of my ticket and pay the ticket online. It's been frustrating since I have to report it to my boss, and also pay the ticket.

The sheriff's department only uploads tickets on Mondays. I have been calling, but repeatedly they haven't found anything and this Thursday was supposed to be the court date, so I was getting nervous. They suggested I call the records department at the sheriff's office, so I do. I reach records and they search for citations on that date with my name on it and they turned up nothing. I tell them the name of the deputy and they transfer me to dispatch. Dispatch says they found the name of the deputy, a call log of the traffic stop, but the deputy had left the department that week.

Apparently before he had left he hadn't uploaded the tickets in his system. They said they would talk to the other deputies and have them upload his tickets for him. So sure enough I get a call today from the court with a new court date and payment information for my ticket.

TL;DR: I lost my ticket and called the sheriff's department. If I hadn't lost it they probably would never have uploaded them to the system for me and everyone else that got pulled over in that two week period, so now we all have our original fines and new court dates. Yay.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/dust-bit-another-one on 2025-06-09 20:32:20+00:00.

So this morning, truly a TIFU… I woke up for an early shift. I work six days a week and today is my ‘Friday’. I like my coffee done in a French press. In my sleep deprived state I added sugar to the press and poured the hot water in to steep while I took my dog out to go to the bathroom. The house is still dark with some nightlights around so I can see just enough, but not enough to see the color of the brew I just made. Added more sugar, some cream, tasted, was confused for a bit until I realized what I did. Didn’t have enough time left before I had to leave for work to try again, so I had to soldier through the day without… anyhow, I’m off to take a nap now.

TL/DR: made myself some hot sugar water instead of coffee this morning and didn’t have time to make it over again.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/lenoreislostAF on 2025-06-09 20:28:36+00:00.

My husband and I adopted 2 kids from foster care several years ago.

We got married in our 30s, waited a few years and tried to have a baby unsuccessfully and decided our IVF money would be better spent on a child that actually existed instead of the imaginary baby that we may or may not have been able to have.

Our kids are full siblings. One is medically complex and the other is… emotionally complex.

Our adoption story is beautiful. But it’s the Disney version of adoption through foster care. We were almost supernaturally lucky in how easy and fast everything went.

I have been asked about our experience several times in the last few years and I tell every single person that our story is NOT typical. It is the TV Movie version of real life and definitely should not be the only research that a couple does before taking the plunge.

My mom met a woman who was dealing with infertility issues and shared with her that I am knowledgeable about adoption and sent her my way.

So, I gave her our story, the Disney spiel and brought up some of the uglier sides of adoption to make sure that I made my point.

I guess that was enough to scare her husband off of adoption. Like, period. Totally took it off the table.

The woman (who I didn’t know before this) is mad at me and thinks I ruined her chances to be a mom and my mom says that maybe I shouldn’t have been quite so candid.

I feel like absolute crap.

The thing is that what I told them was pretty mild. Reality is harsh but I wasn’t trying to traumatize anyone. I just wanted to make sure that I wasn’t misleading them.

So, now I’m our tiny town’s biggest asshole.

TLDR: Infertile lady asked me about adoption. I answered honestly and now her husband refuses to adopt.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/rooiboshoe on 2025-06-09 11:59:27+00:00.

This is from a few months ago

I am a self-proclaimed carrot cake lover - it is the dessert I am most likely to get at any café/restaurant (on the condition it has no raisins, naturally). Being a seasoned baker and craving a slice, I have decided to find a proper non-raisin recipe online and make it at home.

It was early afternoon and I'd been rolling on very few hours of sleep that specific week and did not read the recipe properly. Instead of 1 1/3 cup of oil suggested by the recipe writer, I added 1/3 cup of oil into my wet ingredients. Now, if you've made cake before, skipping that amount of liquid usually makes a big difference in the expected batter texture. Noticing that something was off, I made one or two small adjustments (adding a bit of sour cream and more vanilla) before coming back to the recipe and noticing I had, in fact, fucked up. I am a troubleshooter, though, so I added the cup of oil at the end, hoping the cake won't turn out too bad, put it in the oven and prayed that the texture will turn out okay.

Here's the thing.

It turned out perfect. I am not shitting you, it was the best cake I'd ever had. I could not believe I'd made it, and neither could my boyfriend. I did not even have the time to make the icing after tasting it, because it was devoured in the span of an hour.

You're thinking, okay, that's not a fuckup though.

I have not been able to replicate it and no cake now measures to it.

I have tried about a dozen times, by making the same recipe properly, by trying to replicate the fuck up, and all it's done is just leave me with the feeling that I'll never be able to enjoy carrot cake again. My boyfriend, aka the cake tester, shatters my hopes every time by tasting it and shaking his head. We've both dreamed of said carrot cake. He's burned his tongue a few times, not being patient enough to wait until the cake cooled off, he craves it so much.

TL;DR: I fucked up by making a mistake when baking and it turned out to be the best cake of my life. I haven't been able to replicate it since and will probably die trying.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/SofiiStrada18 on 2025-06-09 02:18:26+00:00.

This was last night and I still want to get under the bed.

My boyfriend came home after a few days of not seeing each other, so I, in my romantic mind, thought it would be a good idea to do something a little more... suggestive. I went to bathe, I put on all my perfume, I put on that robe that I never wear (you know, the one that's like silk and always falls off a little bit) and I left the bathroom with the best femme fatale attitude I could muster.

Spoiler: it didn't even last five seconds.

There was a wet towel on the floor that I didn't see. I step on one foot, skid, lose my balance, and fall with a noise that sounded like a piece of furniture had fallen. The robe opened completely and I ended up on the floor, half naked, tangled in myself and screaming from fright/pain/embarrassment.

My boyfriend came running thinking I had fainted or something. He sees me lying there, my robe open, my leg raised like a broken puppet, and he starts laughing. Kind, real laugh, from crying. Me trying to cover myself with what I could while everything hurt.

Now every time I walk by the bathroom he gives me a “lingerie catalog model” pose and laughs to himself.

TL;DR: I wanted to surprise my boyfriend in a sexy robe, I slipped on a towel, I ended up naked and humiliated on the bathroom floor.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/AlEcyler on 2025-06-08 21:18:15+00:00.

So yesterday I posted how I had fucked up by deleting my wife's Animal Crossing island in a failed transfer. She was very sad, but I promised her I'd start my own island and play with her so she wouldn't have to rebuild herself.

When I went to start my own island Tom Nook told.me he had some old save data he didn't know what to do with. Turns out it was my wife's island. I went in on her account, enabled back up and let it do its thing.

The backup saved overnight and she was able to log into her island this morning with everything still intact Not much more to share really. Thanks to everyone who was wishing me well and gave advice on how to recover it.

tl:dr I was able to recover my wife's deleted island and her and my bf are visiting each other's island right now.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Pulser01011 on 2025-06-08 20:35:25+00:00.

So this happened last night at like 2 in the morning. Couldn’t sleep because the room felt like a toaster. Got up to take a shit. Nothing dramatic, just tired and sweaty.

Grabbed two squares of toilet paper. For whatever reason, I wiped with my left hand (not normal for me), and had another square in my right just kinda holding it while trying to dab the sweat off my face. I don’t know what short-circuited in my brain but I wiped my forehead with the wrong one.It hit immediately. Not just a little smudge.Center of my face. Just sat there for a second staring at the floor like I’d just been betrayed by myself. Then I panic-washed. Face, hands, probably parts that weren’t even involved. I think I used dish soap at one point. Didn’t sleep after that. Just lay there thinking about how fast things went from “ it’s hot” to “I just shit-smeared my own face.”

TL;DR: Got shitfaced without any alcohol

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/BlankSthearapy on 2025-06-08 18:08:32+00:00.

Whenever I’m being creative in the kitchen I like to use smell to decide what I’m adding in to the dish. I was having a late breakfast after sleeping in on my first day off in weeks. I got a little stoned and made a tequila, grapefruit spritzer.

With tequila on my mind, I started making quesadillas, with spinach egg mix cooked around it. I decided I wanted to top it with a spicy Greek yogurt topping and mixed in habanero powder and some vinegar.

I needed something crunchy on top, so I deep fried garbanzo beans. I remembered I had just received a habanero mango spice mix from a friend. I wanted to smell how strong the mango was. I shook the jar and went in for a sniff. As I went in I noticed a little dust wafting inside the spice jar, but by the time I realized just how bad of an idea this was, I took a big whiff of fine habanero dust.

My eyes and nose instantly just started leaking fluid while I coughed and started dry heaving. I was miserable, looking for relief and didn’t want to wash it deeper into my sinuses rinsing it, so I dipped my fingers in butter and coated the inside of my nose. The relief was exquisite.

The garbanzos tossed with the mango habanero on top of the dish turned out excellent!

TL;DR took a big whiff of habanero dust this morning

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Signal_Skill9761 on 2025-06-08 16:34:56+00:00.

For the first time in many many years (single mom, working and going to school) I had NOTHING to do yesterday (Saturday). Kids were at their dad's, my new job (using my degree, YAY me) starts Monday so my old job is done, and im on summer break from my graduate degree. So you know what I did yesterday? Absolutely nothing. Stayed in bed and sat on my ass all day. It was GLORIOUS. I literally only get the opportunity to do that every couple years. Since I didn't do anything I didn't drink my normal cup of coffee in the morning. There was no need to, I wasn't doing anything or going anywhere. Let me tell you, caffeine withdrawal headaches are a bitch.

TL;DR: Took one deserved day of laziness to sit around and do nothing. Now I can't function from caffeine withdrawals.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/peculiar_pandabear on 2025-06-08 10:41:03+00:00.

Picture this: you’re dog sitting for friends. They have a wiiiide open land. Big ass house. You’re alone, and have anxiety.

The dogs sleeping in the room with you bark, at 2am. You startle awake, and listen to what’s happening. There is movement outside. Every so often, there is thudding and a scattering noise, as if someone is making their way through the house looking to steal shit. The owner of the house is pretty well off, and has a lot of very valuable stuff.

You believe that this house is the victim of burglary.

You call so so so many people in a panic in your room. You’re not sure what to do- go out and look? Call 911? Run out swinging your 40oz water bottle wildly in self defense? Lay in wait while whoever is in the house gets closer?

The dogs starts chewing a bone, giving away your location.

You hear the thudding get closer and closer. Whoever’s moving is working their way to you. The dogs are unnaturally calm.

You call non emergency dispatch. They send out F I V E cop cars. When the cops arrive, you walk out from the side porch with your hands up. They sound annoyed.

You let them in through the room you’re stationed in, having to secure the dogs in the bathroom because the cop says he “doesn’t feel safe around them”. You do not want the dogs to get shot. Your heart is beating a million miles an hour. Why you, why now, why must the dogs be going so crazy? The cops make their way through the house. You wait on the porch at their direction. After a torturous few minutes, they gather together with you. The most annoyed of the group (the one that’s scared of the dogs) goes:

“it’s highly likely that that skittering and thudding you hear across the floors is gonna be the roomba.”

Congratulations, you’ve worried your mother, boyfriend, and father, riled up the dogs, and wasted an hour of the cops and dispatchers time.

TL;DR: called the cops on an intruder while housesitting. The intruder was a fucking roomba.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Sorceress683 on 2025-06-07 23:40:42+00:00.

Obligatory not today obviously. This actually happened a few years ago when I was living in japan. As I was in the early years of me living there, I didn't 100% know how to distinguish certain buildings. There were a lot of small temples around and shrines, and I had gotten used to them looking a certain way. Well, I took a day trip to Kyoto to wander around, see the sights, and find smaller more out of the way interesting places.

At the time, I hadn't yet bought a smartphone. It takes a lot of time out of a day to try and sit down with a company and get a contract signed and whatnot, so I hadn't bothered. Instead, I had a basic City map from the main station and a one day bus pass and just settled in to getting lost. I got into a slightly hilly area near one of the major temples, and I saw a few signs on the map for shrines or temples for smaller locations. So, I set out to wander in the direction of one.

Now here's the fuck up. I suck at reading maps. Really suck. I have a general sense of how they go, but the whole orienting the north part upwards and then tracing where you're going otherwise really doesn't work for me. I have to put the map at an angle with the direction in front of me upwards. So, I'm trying my best to wander around in search of small temples and I see a long narrow road leading up a hill in front of me and various signs in japanese. It looks promising, so I follow this narrow road thinking cool mountain Temple! At the end of this road, I found an ancient building. Very traditional looking with gorgeous wood and Clay roof tiles. This seemed really promising. Of course there doesn't seem to be anyone around, but that's fairly far for the course in the middle of the day in a location that is not the most popular or well known. There was however a deck with a few stairs up to it on the outside of the building and it had a great view of the city.

I sat down and pulled out my journal just so that I could start a little bit of writing. I got lost in it but was startled when I was approached from behind by an older woman. She looked rather puzzled, but held out a teacup towards me. That's when I realized that she was not dressed as Temple staff but was wearing a normal house dress and we opened door behind her look like a normal house interior. I had accidentally found my way up somebody's very long driveway to a very traditional antique house and was sitting on their porch. Fortunately for me, the woman just seemed mildly amused and confused at the Foreigner on her steps.

TLDR: got lost in Kyoto, ended up mistaking a person's house for a temple and being served tea by a confused housewife

Edit: for those who asked what happened next, I drank the tea which was very nice. I thanked her politely and then walked back down the hill towards what I hoped would be an actual Temple.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/ConsciousGate2814 on 2025-06-07 22:18:12+00:00.

I was at Sam's Club today with my mom. This stupid cleaning robot had veered straight towards us once and we had to run out of the way and then it stopped dead in the middle of the aisle so nobody could get around. Needless to say, I was mildly annoyed by the cleaning robot.

I go into an aisle and the stupid fucking cleaning robot came driving up the aisle, chugging along. My mom and I have a stupid sense of humor, so as a joke, I shouted "Back, you vile beast!" At the robot.

At that exact moment a couple rounds the corner and they stare directly at me. They appeared to be Muslim (woman wearing hijab) and she pulled out her phone and pointed it directly at me. I assume she was recording in case I did anything to her. At this point I should have just explained that I was not talking to her, but I just turned away and left.

I really hope she wasn't recording me because without context, it looks like I'm a raging Islamophobic bigot calling random women vile beasts.

TL;DR I yelled at a cleaning robot and accidentally called the lady behind it a vile beast, she was recording me.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/SouthernAT on 2025-06-07 20:19:17+00:00.

As with most of these stories, this didn't happen today, but several months ago.

I had a day off from work and decided to have some alone time. Being the religious man I am, I went and drove to the local Cathedral of my state and sat on the steps, reading the Bible, overlooking the city below, and just enjoying some peace and quiet. It was a chilly fall day, and I was leaning against a pillar, resting on the steps, when a woman approached me.

"Excuse me, do you know what the photography policy is here? Do you know where we're allowed to take pictures?"

I glanced behind the woman and saw a group of about ten men and women in their nicest formal attire. I particularly noticed a woman with her hair nicely done, wearing a long, flowing white dress. Obviously, this was a wedding party here to take some photos, and the woman I was speaking to was the photographer. As it so happened, I actually did know the photography policy for the Cathedral. my wife is an avid photographer, and we had taken photos from the hill overlooking the city just a few weeks prior.

I got up and walked over to the couple, along with the photographer. I pointed out the approved photo spots, explained the policy to the group, and told them about some other parts of the Cathedral that would make for excellent shots without violating any of the guidelines. I also gave my most heartfelt congratulations to the couple, wishing them well and an amazing wedding day. Everyone was so thankful and happy to have run into me. As I turned to leave, the couple asked if they could take a photo with me. Odd, I thought, but why not? We took a quick photo on the steps before I got ready to leave.

As I was getting ready to depart, the wife and photographer approached me. The wife said

"Thank you so much for your help, Father. It's really great that the clergy here are so welcoming and helpful. We're from out of state, getting married here because our family wants us to. I appreciate your time with your busy schedule."

I froze. I glanced down at myself. I'm dressed in a nice shirt and slacks with a cross necklace hanging out, but I definitely didn't look like a priest. Maybe she thought I was a priest in casual attire? No idea. Unsure of what to do, all I said was congratulations again before quickly heading to my car and getting out of there. To this day, I realize that some couple has a wedding photo with me in it and a story about the nice priest who helped them out. Felt too awkward at the time to inform them of their error. So, I guess I was promoted, just from being in the right place at the right time. My wife will be surprised to learn we are suddenly Catholic, and I am now a priest.

TL;DR: Minding my own business on the Cathedral steps when a wedding party asks for help. Help them, they mistake me for a priest, and my dumb butt was too awkward to correct them.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/wafflehouseat2am on 2025-06-07 20:00:42+00:00.

This technically happened yesterday, but reached a resolution today.

So, yesterday I walked into work a little before 10am. There was a DoorDash delivery from Starbucks sitting by the door addressed to the name Felix. It is important to note that there is nobody who works here by that name, but I work at a hair salon and assumed it was for someone’s client.

A little time goes by and one of my coworkers goes around asking if anyone had ordered door dash, and got a unanimous “No.”

A couple hours later, I see the sandwich from that order sitting on the table in the break room. There were three other people in there and I asked if we had ever figured out who it belonged to. They all said no and one of my coworkers (I’ll call her Jessica) said I was free to eat it if I’d like. It’s one of my favorite things from the Starbucks menu, so I jumped on the offer.

About an hour later I was chilling in the break room while my client’s color was processing. Another coworker of mine (I’ll call her Ivy) walked in, shuffles some things around on the table, then asked “where’s my sandwich?”

I froze. I wanted to speak up and tell her what happened but I just froze. The salon owner comes in and they start searching the break room, and EVEN THE TRASH to see if it had been thrown away by accident. Thankfully at this point my timer went off to wash out my client’s color, so I slowly and quietly just backed out of the room. I know that was a bit immature, but seriously I was panicking.

This morning I get to work and two of my coworkers jokingly tell me that I’m in trouble. Jessica said she overheard Ivy talking about her missing sandwich and came clean about what happened. She told Ivy that it wasn’t my fault as I had been told I could have it and they both had a good laugh about it.

I texted Ivy today to apologize, both for eating her sandwich and for not coming clean in the moment. I told her it was 100% an accident and that I felt like an asshole in that moment and just panicked. I asked her to send me her Starbucks order so that I could pick some up for her the next time we work together.

She responded that she wasn’t mad at all, it was just a misunderstanding and I was sweet for offering. She said not to worry about buying her Starbucks, but I could bring her a redbull one day if I feel so inclined.

ETA: the food was delivered before Ivy got to work (I assume the guy she’s seeing ordered it for her) and she arrived after my coworker had asked who it belonged to. She was unaware that we had looked for the owner, and everyone else was unaware that it was hers

Tl;dr: a miscommunication led to me eating my coworker’s lunch and I fled the scene in a panic when I realized my mistake. Everyone has talked, no one is mad, and we’ve all had a good laugh

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Tryftz on 2025-06-07 05:56:20+00:00.

So this happened today, and I’m still mortified. I was starving at work and decided to reheat my leftover spaghetti. I tossed the container in the microwave, set the timer, and zoned out on my phone, daydreaming about that first glorious bite. About 30 seconds in, I hear this weird crackling noise and see flashes of light through the microwave window. That’s when it hit me—I’d left a metal fork buried under the noodles. Before I could react, the microwave started sparking like a mini fireworks show. I yanked the door open, but it was too late: a small flame had started inside, and smoke began pouring out. Cue my panic mode. I grabbed the nearest mug of water and tossed it inside (which, in hindsight, was probably not the best idea). The fire fizzled but the smoke kept billowing out, and someone in the break room—bless their cautious soul—decided to pull the fire alarm. Suddenly, the entire office was echoing with blaring sirens and flashing lights. Everyone evacuated into the parking lot, shivering and grumbling about their interrupted Zoom calls. Five minutes later, the fire department showed up in full gear, only to discover my very charred lunch and a sheepish, red-faced me. Now, not only does the office smell like burnt spaghetti, but I’m also the proud owner of the nickname “Sparky” and the star of next week’s safety meeting. TL;DR: Left a fork in my lunch, started a mini fire, set off the fire alarm, evacuated the building, and got a visit from the fire department. My spaghetti and my dignity are both toast.