I was out drinking with some Irish heavyweights. Learnt my lesson. I reached a point where I was unconscious on the curb while they were still seemingly 100%. They woke me up to say it was my round to buy another pitcher of Mojito or something (which I think was their way of winding down slowly). So I managed to get more down after that, unfortunately for the cab driver who later drove me.
The window was open, and so I was able to get most of the HCl out the window, down the door exterior. That’s better than upholstery. Cab driver was not happy. I think he demanded something like €30 or €50 to clean it up. I don’t recall, but I was able to haggle him down to €15 or 20. As plastered as I was, IANAL but the analytical law part of the brain triggered and functioned well enough that I could pitch my defense case like this:
- Did I sign a contract when I stepped in here agreeing to a vomit cleanup fee?
- Can you show me a placard on your dashboard disclosing a vomit cleanup fee?
- Most of it is on the outside of the door (just do a robotic car wash bro).. you just have a little on the inside of the door.
- It’s not the really chunky variety, FWIW.
- Will you take €15/20? (I forgot exactly what deal we struck but he seemed satisfied that he was at least getting some compensation)
Indeed after sobering up I realized I was the asshole. Or maybe we both were. IDK.. weird situation. On the one hand, vomit cleanup is not exactly a competitive marketplace. The driver has a monopoly and he can quote whatever crazy price he wants. OTOH, I had all the leverage because I’m basically just anonymous cash-paying street trash without motivation to buy additional services that I don’t need, and you can’t suck blood out of a rock.
In principle it should be me cleaning the car, but I was so dysfunctional.. struggling to walk, I probably couldn’t handle the job to any level of QA that would pass the next customer’s standards. If it weren’t 3am or whatever, we could have driven to a street corner where people just stand around looking for ad hoc work. Then maybe we could have gotten bids from everyone to clean the cab at a competitive market price.
Anyway, if you take a cab in Brussels and see a big loud and clear sign posted on the dash quoting a vomit cleanup fee or the driver requires an advance cleanup deposit, you might know the history.
This should really just be covered by insurance.. like getting a rock chip, no deductible.
Update
I just thought of another fun argument to make for the next time this happens:
A boss once told me: if I know that you are intoxicated when you sign my contract, the contract becomes unenforceable in Belgium.
So, when I step into a cab in a plastered state and there is later a negotiation, I can say “you must have known I was drunk as I stumbled around taking an indirect walking path to your cab and my speech is slurred -- therefore any contract express or implied is null and void.” (as if they are taking advantage of my bad state :)