drolex

~~Are you a southerner by any chance?~~ Do you call it a bap, a roll? I've heard it called 'the spoons' when I was in Manchester (I'm French though, sorry about it. Proof: 'squiwwel')

That's a good story! But you know who's got a better story? Bran the legless.

Too soon?

Hey comrade-citizen! I can't help but notice you are about to use the red pen! Just a note: there is no ink left in it! You should have notified the authorities of your vote 6 years ago! Not to worry though, you can ask the secret police officer in plain clothes over there for a replacement cartridge. He will gladly deliver it to you at the back of the building, against the wall. Don't forget to declare all your family members to him, too! Have a good last day. Before tomorrow I mean.

nix 101 would have been CInix anyway...

Good nerds know their roman numerals

Die and Resurrect Hard: Jesus' Omen, Jesus and the Goblet of Blood and Jesus' Freaky Adventures in the Women's Prison, respectively

Eh, the second is a disappointment compared to the first. The third one is great though, Bruce Willis is excellent in it.

Yeah Paris is shit

Why do you think the best scientists in the world gathered and invented the all-day English breakfast?

I prefer the soothing "you're being hysterical"

No that's Alf. You're thinking of a fantasy race with pointy ears.

Mon client Nestlé France a toujours démontré un sens moral irréprochable et un immense respect du public et son innocence ne fait aucun doute. Ces accusations dans l'affaire concernant M. Ghosn...

Ah pardon, j'ai mélangé le dossier avec celui de mon autre cliente Mme Rachida Dati.

Reprenons. Mon client a certes parfois eu recours à du harcèlement, des agressions verbales, participé à ce qui ressemble à de la corruption active et passive, bénéficié de passe-droits indus... Merde c'est mélangé encore, ou pas ?

ending a war in the Middle East

Got a source for that?